ICE9: Nothing?! You might have nothing to lose but I’d lose everything. My home, my relationship, everything. I knew it was a mistake to meet you last night. I knew it.

Jackdaw44: So it’s my fault we shagged, is it? I forced you into it?

ICE9: You kissed me.

Jackdaw44: I kissed you goodbye and you kissed me back.

ICE9: I should have walked away.

Jackdaw44: You didn’t though, did you? I knew you still had feelings for me. I knew it.

ICE9: I’m sorry. I can’t do this any more. It’s over. For good this time.

Jackdaw44: I’ve heard that before.

Chapter 53

I drive straight to Liz’s house without stopping. She takes one look at my face and wraps her arms around me.

‘Oh, sweetheart. I’m so sorry. He’s such a fucking bastard.’

I let her lead me into the kitchen and sit down on the chair she pulls out. She pushes a box of tissues towards me but I shake my head. I cried all the way from the school to her house but, now I’m here, the tears have dried up.

‘How long has it been going on?’ she asks. ‘Since last year?’

I shake my head. ‘They haven’t been having an affair.’

‘What? But you’ve been crying. I assumed—’

‘He tried to kiss her and she pushed him away.’

‘Did she now?’ She raises an eyebrow.

‘I believe her. She said he was really upset. He told her he loved me and he was scared he was going to lose me—’

‘And so he kissed her. Way to rescue your relationship, Mark! For fuck’s sake.’

‘But he was right. Things weren’t great between us and—’

‘No.’ Liz crosses her arms. ‘I am not going to let you blame yourself for this. This is about Mark, not you. You were going through a bad patch but you didn’t throw yourself at one of your kids’ teachers. Did you?’

‘No.’

‘No, you fucking didn’t. Honestly.’ She opens the fridge and takes out a bottle of wine. ‘I could swing for him. I really could. Men and their fucking dicks.

‘Sorry.’ She takes a deep breath. ‘I’m making this about me. Lloyd is coming over tomorrow and I’m really bloody nervous.’

‘Has he told you why he wants to talk to you yet?’

‘No.’ She takes two glasses out of the cupboard. ‘I guess I’ll find out soon enough. So, what about you? What are you going to do?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘You could leave him.’

‘For a kiss? For lying about something he’s ashamed of? We’ve been married for twenty years.’

‘That’s not a reason to stay together.’