The other mourners had wandered off, tongues wagging, no doubt. My mother and Kathleen had taken shelter in the car, both of them borderline hysterical. I had been whispering my final thoughts to my father on the wind, when I heard footsteps approach. I looked up to see DI Bradley, his hands plunged deep in the pockets of his long black coat, his collar turned up to protect him from the elements, standing a short distance away.

‘I don’t mean to disturb you,’ he said. ‘I can wait until you’re done.’

I looked down at the hastily covered over grave in front of me. It had been covered with a wooden lid for now, which was decked in the wreaths people had sent to offer their sympathy. The mound of dirt, turning into claggy muck in the sleet and hail, would be pushed in on top of him later. The black marble headstone, bearing Natalie’s name, declaring her a beloved daughter, mother and partner in gold letters, would soon bear Joe’s name, too. In that space at the bottom. It was as if it had always been waiting for him.

I blinked and shook my head. ‘It’s okay,’ I said. ‘I have nothing more to say to him. Not today, anyway.’

‘This must be very hard for you all,’ DI Bradley said.

I knew that his words were not just those of a police officer interested in catching the bad guy. They were the words of someone who sees the human tragedy playing out in front of him for what it is. A shitshow of a mess that is destroying everyone.

‘It’s not easy,’ I told him with a shrug.

‘Heidi was very upset.’

‘She was,’ I said. ‘She didn’t want him buried here. I didn’t realise. Maybe I should’ve.’

I didn’t want him thinking poorly of me. Thinking that what Heidi had said was true and that I could legitimately be that cruel without so much as a second thought.

‘We’ve looked into her history. Her mental health history,’ he said. ‘She has had a rough time. But she has been stable for quite some time.’

‘She has, I think. As I’ve told you before, we never actually spent a lot of time in each other’s company. Very little, in fact. Especially in recent years.’

‘But she was responsible for the majority of care your father received, especially as his health deteriorated.’

I blushed. There was a judgement in his statement. How awful was I that I didn’t do my bit.

‘You know, my relationship with my father could best be described as complicated. We didn’t have the time to work on it.’ I looked back to the gravestone. I’m not sure having all the time in the world would have made an ounce of difference. ‘Things were complicated. Things are complicated. I have to live with that. But it doesn’t mean I did anything to hurt him.’

‘No, of course it doesn’t,’ DI Bradley said. ‘I didn’t mean to imply anything. This isn’t an official visit. I’m just offering my sympathies.’