After the funfair date, I felt giddy and bouncing off the walls with energy. I went home and it hit me that there was no one to tell. Briefly, I wondered what it would be like to tell Izzy. We used to talk a lot about me and Hannah, especially when we first started going out. She never made it weird that we were all friends and suddenly the two of us had coupled off. Part of me wanted to call her and tell her. I knew that if I did, we could fall right back into our friendship. If I let that happen. But I couldn’t.

I told myself I was only thinking of her because there was no one else. I certainly didn’t want to tell Dad, and although I had told Mum, it isn’t the same when she doesn’t really get what it means. I wondered how she’d react if she was well and she knew I was with someone other than Hannah. But then, if she was well, maybe I would still be with Hannah.

I let myself splash around in those thoughts for approximately ten minutes and then I locked them in a box and put them away. I was afraid that if I let them out for too long, they’d take over.

Instead of wallowing, I bought Never Been Kissed on demand to start my rom-com journey. It’s not like I was looking forward to watching this mindless fluff, you understand. It was research. Necessary research. And if the candy colors, glossy cinematography, and happy endings seemed kind of refreshing for a change, well, that could be my little secret. I texted Ruby to let her know what I was doing and she sent me back a GIF of a cat cheering. It had become apparent to me over the last few days that cat GIFs were her main form of text communication; she had one for every occasion.

I was arranging my pillows for optimal comfort when Dad rapped on the doorway. He came in without waiting for an invitation. Of course.

“What’s going on here?” He frowned at the screen, which showed a candy-colored Drew Barrymore.

“Um . . .”

“Are you watching a rom-com?” he said, incredulous.

“No. Maybe. So what if I am? I thought you were going out.”

He was meeting Beth to pick gifts for the bridal party. Not entirely sure why you have to buy other people presents on your wedding day just because they held a ring or stood behind you in a dress but whatever. Come to think of it why do you have to buy the bride and groom a present either? It’s already “the happiest day of your life,” isn’t it? Is that not enough?