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Back The Falling in Love Montage
Chapters (45)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. 1.
  4. 2.
  5. 3.
  6. 4.
  7. 5.
  8. 6.
  9. 7.
  10. 8.
  11. 9.
  12. 10.
  13. 11.
  14. 12.
  15. 13.
  16. 14.
  17. 15.
  18. 16.
  19. 17.
  20. 18.
  21. 19.
  22. 20.
  23. 21.
  24. 22.
  25. 23.
  26. 24.
  27. 25.
  28. 26.
  29. 27.
  30. 28.
  31. 29.
  32. 30.
  33. 31.
  34. 32.
  35. 33.
  36. 34.
  37. 35.
  38. 36.
  39. 37.
  40. 38.
  41. Acknowledgments
  42. About the Author
  43. Books by Ciara Smyth
  44. Back Ad
  45. About the Publisher

“I love you,” I said, and I thought about how amazing it was that this moment would exist forever. Perfect and unchanged. A moment where I would always be madly in with love Ruby Quinn.

So if you’re wondering if we “did it,” if we had sex? We did. It was nothing like you see in the movies. And I was wrong; it did change things. Sometimes the best feelings in the world don’t last forever. They’re explosions in the body or the heart or both at once, and you know that you’ll never be the same as before, but it’s OK because you can always build something new in the wreckage.

38.

“Hi, sorry, can you tell me where the freshers’ fair is?” I stop a girl who is walking in the opposite direction. She has a bundle of flyers in her hands and about seven thousand pins stuck to her T-shirt.

“Back that way,” she says, pointing in the direction she came from. “Just through the double doors and then turn left, you won’t miss it.”

Through the doors a village of makeshift stands sag against one another, adorned with bowls of sweets, photographs of collegiate camaraderie, and colorful flyers with club details and Twitter handles.

I promised Dad I’d be a joiner, that I’d get the full university experience, but it’s week two and I haven’t really bonded with anyone yet. Although all the changes are sometimes a distraction, I’m still pretty sad about Ruby. I miss her, but that’s normal. Or so I told myself when I cried the whole first week, face-first into my pillow, and wailed about how I’d never love again.

It would have been so much easier to make friends if I’d been in halls, and it sometimes crosses my mind that it might have been a mistake to decline my place at Oxford. I just had to put myself out there and meet new people. Of course, Dad will always be a bit confused by how I could give up a place at the mighty Oxford to stay at home and take a course I’d only applied for because the career guidance teacher was bothering me about keeping my options open. But when I got the email about my Irish offers it stuck out; it just felt right. Now I wonder if some part of my subconscious knew better. Besides, UCD is only an hour from home. Most important, I get to see Mum every evening. It’s hard because she’s not always in a good place, but I like knowing Hannah will be there working through her gap year. Sometimes Dad and I go together.