– Naw, he snaps, – no way. Ah want that kind ay psychic communion, gittin right inside each other’s nut, like astral flight and that. He presses his forefinger onto my head. – And that period is now until I find it. Never had it, man. Had the internal rhythms, but no the joining ay the souls. Never even came close. The eckies help, but the only way you can get the joining ay the souls is if you let her into your head and she lets you into hers, at the same time. It’s communication, man. You can’t get that with any Party Chick, even when you’re both E’d up. It has to be love. That’s what ah’m really lookin for, Lloyd: love.

Ah smile into his big eyes and say, – Yir a fuckin sexual philosopher, Mister Boyle.

– Naw ah’m no jokin. Ah’m lookin for love.

– Maybe that’s what we’re all really looking for, Ally.

– The thing is Lloyd, man, mibee ye cannae look fir it. Mibee it hus tae find you.

– Aye, but until ye do, ye want a fuckin good ride but, eh.

LATER ON, AMBER tearfully tells me that Ally’s rejected her and won’t sleep with her cause he doesnae love her as a lover, just as a pal. Nukes is in the kitchen with us and he just throws his hands up as if this is aw too heavy and says, – Ah’m away … see yis … But ah notice that the cunt has left wi this lassie, and this is the cue for everybody to head off but ah stay back and try to explain Ally’s stance to Amber and Hazel and do some lines of coke with her and we watch the sun come up and discuss everything. Hazel goes through to bed but Amber wants to stay up talking. Eventually, though, she falls asleep on the couch. Ah go through to another bedroom and get a quilt and put it over her. She looks peaceful. She needs a boyfriend: a nice young guy who’ll look after her and let her look after him. Ah think about getting intae bed with Hazel and crashing but ah could feel the distance growing between us with the MDMA running down in our bodies. Ah head hame and although I’m not religious ah pray for a boyfriend for Amber and a special girlfriend each for Ally and me. I’m not religious but ah just like the idea ay friends hoping for good things for each other; like the idea of all this goodwill floating around in psychic space.

Back hame ah neck two eggs and wash them down with a bottle of Becks. Ah stagger tae bed where a strange, disturbed sleep descends on me. Ah’m in Cunt City’s familiar district of Shag-You-Up-The-Fuckin-Hole.

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