– Dinnae ken. There’s something missing in ma life. Ah’m an auld cunt now, compared tae you at any rate, and I’ve never really been in love. That’s fuckin sad, ah telt her, snortin the lines. They are rough and fiery as fuck on my nasal lining.

Amber said, – Aw Lloyd … and gave me a hug and ah wished that ah could be in love with her but I’m no, so nae sense in kiddin oan aye cause that’s shite fir every cunt and aw yi’ll get is a ride oot ay it and a ride is never worth a good friendship.

She left just as my head blew apart.

8

ALLY WAS RIGHT about this stuff. It was true: ye dinnae even blink for days. Ah was soon surging with energy and thoughts. Ah couldnae blink. Ah tried, tried tae force a blink as ah sat oan the lavvy daein a shite. Then something happened: ah couldnae stop blinking. Ah felt sick and thought ah was gaunnae pass out. Ah hit the cold lino on the bathroom floor and felt better with my red throbbing face against it. The blinking stopped and ah was alert again.

The door went and it was a guy called Seeker. He stepped past me into the hallway. He held up a bag and then hooked it onto a small, metal set of scales he’d produced. – Ten grams, he said, – take a dab.

Ah did, though ah couldnae really tell the purity ay the coke from it, cause I’m no a big coke-heid, although it seemed better than Abdab’s. Ah asked Seeker if ah could snort a line. He rolled his eyes impatiently, then he chopped out one each for us on the worktop in my kitchen. Ah felt that satisfying numbness but ah was so up on the meth that a poofy line ay toot would make nae real difference. That whole fuckin bag would make nae difference. Anyway, ah gave Seeker his dosh and he fucked off. He’s a weird cunt that, no intae any scene, but every cunt kens him.

Ah hive aboot a fifth ay the gear and stick in an equivalent ay non-perfumed talc and mix it. Thir isnae much ay a difference.