It will get easier, for us both soon, I hope.

All my love and gratitude,

Walter.

The letter is a stab to the heart. I am his past. Anna is his future.

He is never coming back. He won’t be in contact again.

I read his words over and over. I touch the paper he touched. I try smelling it, to see if there is any hint of him on the page. But there is none. Just a taste of his new life. And once his family is gone, no trace of him will be left here, in this city of his birth.

*

‘You’ve missed coffee and cake!’ Bertha exclaims when I eventually push open the back door and return with Kuschi, still fingering the letter in my pocket.

‘I’m not really hungry anyway,’ I tell her, releasing Kuschi from his leash.

Bertha picks up a cloth and begins to dry the crockery she has recently washed.

‘Everything all right, Fräulein Herta?’ she asks, tilting her head slightly, concern in her hooded, grey eyes.

I swallow the lump in my throat.

‘Sit down,’ she instructs. ‘I’ll make you some hot chocolate.’

I sink down onto the bench at the big oak table.

‘Thank you, Bertha,’ I mumble. I watch her pour the milk into a pan, fetch the cocoa and spoon it into a waiting pot. She adds the sugar and leans against the stove as she stirs the milk. It seems that she, at least, is forgiven by my parents.

‘You’re missing him, I suppose,’ she says.

‘Is it so obvious? He sent me a letter. Seems to be settling into London life.’

‘That’s good, isn’t it? Not much of a life here for him, was it?’

‘I know. He deserves a good life, after everything…’

She flashes me a look.

‘And so do you, Fräulein Herta. So do you.’

‘Even after I risked all that trouble for you?’

‘All’s forgiven, Fräulein. Forgotten about.’ She takes the pan off the heat and pours steaming milk into the pot, stirring.

‘He’s getting married, you know. He has to, to get the visa.’

Bertha places the pot, a sugar bowl and a cup and saucer on a tray.

‘I don’t know much about most things, it’s true,’ she says slowly. ‘But I know a little about love affairs. And I know this: you can’t hold on to Walter forever. He’s gone now. Safe, but gone. It’s time you moved on and found someone new.’

‘But you never did.’

She places the tray in front of me and looks me squarely in the face.

‘Which is exactly why I know what you must do. It’s over. Blessedly, no harm’s come to either of you, and that’s to be thankful for. You’re young. You have plenty of time.’ She places a hand on my shoulder, gives it a squeeze and walks back to the draining board to continue her work.

I pour the steaming chocolate from the pot and cradle the cup in my hands. I watch Bertha with a grateful heart.