‘He wouldn’t!’

‘No, rationally I know he wouldn’t. But – and this is horrible, so please don’t tell anyone – when I found out I was pregnant I was happy, but I was also pretty sad, and I still am.’ She has put down her fork and is gesturing slightly manically with her hands. She’s not typically a gesturer. ‘I want kids, I’ve always wanted kids, but kids weren’t in my plan for at least five years. We’ve had to cancel the honeymoon, I’m having horrible morning sickness, I feel fat, and I can’t return those ugly amphibious shoes I bought. I tried, but they’ll only give me store credit because I can’t find the receipt.’

‘So take the store credit?’

‘They only bloody sell amphibious shoes. And I’m not going to be going to the rainforest any time soon now, am I?’

‘Oh, Mia, that sucks. I’m not gonna lie to you. This is huge. A baby is huge. But it isn’t any more than you can handle. It might be more than your vagina can handle, but you are going to be a great mum. And Mark is going to be a great dad.’

Her shoulders slump. ‘What if my baby knows that not all of me wanted them at first? Do you think they can tell?’

For a moment, in the midst of Mia’s huge emotional crisis, I’m so glad to have her back. So glad that somehow the last few months feel like no time at all.

‘I don’t think they can tell.’ I give her my biggest thank-you-for-coming-back-to-me smile. ‘Besides, the fact you’re worrying about this tells me that you’re already on your way to becoming a good mum. From what I understand, the first thing on the job description is to worry.’

At this she smiles a small smile, enough for me to know that she is OK.

‘Ugh, I just wanted some time for me. And I know that’s selfish, but I feel like I’ve spent the last five years either working ridiculously long hours or planning a wedding, and neither of those things were really for me – both were for my family. And finally I feel like I have time for myself, the wedding is over and I’m in a good place at work, I have proved myself and am doing things I find interesting at last … and I don’t want to have a baby and mess that all up.’

‘Well, I don’t work in your company, so I don’t know what it will be like for you, and obviously everyone and everywhere is different, but I don’t think having a baby is as impactful on your career projection these days – I think companies have to be a lot more careful. At my company, people leave for maternity, but when they return they go straight back into the role they were doing before, if they want to. I think people are a lot more aware. Having a baby doesn’t make you a less important or less capable employee. If anything, it makes you more focused. And besides, everyone has shit going on outside work. And if they don’t, they should. Nobody wants to work with someone who only works.’ I genuinely hope what I’m saying proves to be true for Mia. But today is not necessarily about truth – it’s more about reassurance.