On my way to the bus stop I reach for my phone. Mia will be twitching with anticipation; she’ll start calling soon if I don’t send her an update.

It went well! He seemed really nice and most importantly – normal! We even had a cheeky kiss!

I add in the teenage gossip because I know Mia will be proud. Her reply is instant.

Oh yay! This is great! Was the kiss good?

I’m about to type out my answer as my phone rings. It’s Mum. It’s quite late for her to be calling.

‘Hey, Mum! Are you OK?’

‘Bea! Yes, I’m fine. Are you OK? You sound happy. What have you been up to?’ How can mums always tell when there is something juicy going on?

‘I’m OK too.’ I haven’t told her about any of my dates as she would get her hopes up, so I remain purposefully vague. ‘I’ve had a good day. And I had a charcuterie board for dinner.’

‘Oh, that is good.’

‘How are you doing? How’s Hugo?’ Hugo is my mum’s dog and best friend.

‘Oh, he’s fine. He’s currently napping.’ I can imagine the two of them now. Both snuggled with a blanket. One of them lightly snoring.

‘I was wondering if you were thinking of coming home soon. I saw your favourite face wash on offer and I thought I would pick some up.’

I do need to go see her. I haven’t been home since before Mia’s wedding. My dad isn’t around any more, so my brother Fred and I like to visit her at least once a month. Sadly my dating escapades have made it harder to find the free time.

I lie slightly. ‘I was actually hoping to come home in the next couple of weeks. Would that be OK?’

‘That would be lovely. You lead such busy lives, you and your brother. But only come home if you can. Just let me know beforehand so I can pick up something for dinner.’

Mum fills me in on all the town gossip, including a shocking case of petty arson at the local park. I listen happily, glad to be distracted from my more anxious thoughts. I had a good time tonight, but what if I read the situation wrong? What if I was a little too ‘me’? What if he thought my bum was a little too big, my wonky walk a little too wonky, my conversation too meandering?

I look up in time to see my bus pulling in ahead of me. I half run towards it, hoping nobody I know is around to see.

I reach the doors in time and make a big faff trying to get my card out to pay. It’s hard to do with a phone in one hand. ‘Mum, I’ve got to go, my bus is here.’ The idea of a bus full of people overhearing my mum’s fairly middle-class problems makes me cringe, so I keep the goodbye short and meander my thoughts back to Toby as I find my seat.