He wriggled out of his jacket and dropped it onto the floor.

‘I love you so much,’ he said, moving closer to my face. ‘Do you love me?’

‘Of course I love you,’ I replied, slightly confused by his need for reassurance.

‘Do you love me for all my faults?’ he continued.

I looked at him, puzzled. ‘Are you trying to tell me something?’

‘Just that I love you, I love you so much,’ he said again.

Perhaps he was trying to make light of the fact he was blatantly drunk – and horny.

‘For all your faults,’ I said.

Then he held my head in his hands and we began to kiss, gently at first and then with more urgency. I could smell cigarettes on his breath; he occasionally succumbed when he was drinking. But I was glad he had made an effort with the dads from The Baby Group, and I couldn’t begrudge him a few extra pints this evening, he’d been so attentive to us all week.

Jason flung the duvet back and placed his hand over my nightdress, on the top of my thigh. I felt self-conscious and also nervous about what he was going to find under there, in a region I had successfully avoided thinking about, let alone touched, in any way other than a medical one, since giving birth. And it was still fairly early days to be having sex again. I was worried about how it would feel to have him inside me. I stiffened slightly.

Before I could decide whether this was a good idea, Jason was already pulling his jumper and T-shirt off over his head.

‘Baby, just go slowly, okay,’ I urged, holding onto his shoulders as he pulled me on top of him. If I’d known this was going to happen, I wouldn’t have put my breast pads in. I pulled them out and tossed them onto the floor quickly, all the while trying not to think about which colour of Sainsbury’s finest big granny knickers I was wearing under my nightie this evening. At least I had weaned myself off the gigantic sanitary pads by now. ‘I think it will be all right, at least I hope—’

He silenced me by sticking his tongue into my mouth again. ‘Oh Aish,’ he moaned between kisses, ‘I’ve missed you. I’ve missed you so much.’

‘I’ve missed you too, baby,’ I whispered self-consciously. I felt as though I had completely forgotten what to do during foreplay, let alone how to make love or talk dirty.

I glanced towards the cocoon. At least Joni was asleep – she shouldn’t see this, it could scar her for life.

It didn’t matter that I had regressed to a virgin because Jason was in the mood to show me what to do. His lips and hands were everywhere, as I prayed he wouldn’t squeeze my breasts too hard because milk was certainly going to come out. My nipples tingled with delight – and a little engorgement. He took one into his mouth and sucked.