“It isn’t fair,” she fumed. “Why does there have to be another war? Why does it have to upset everything we’ve worked for?”

“We endured a European war once before.”

Lena moved to block his path, stopping him as he turned to the open dresser drawer. “You know how much I worry about Ans, far away in Leiden. Now I’ll be worried about you, too.”

Pieter rarely lost his temper, but his voice grew louder, his tone sharp. “You have to stop this useless fretting, Lena! The Bible says, ‘Do not be anxious about anything’!”

She gaped at him in surprise. Pieter was a man of faith, but he rarely spoke of it. And he never quoted Scripture.

“You can’t just say ‘stop’ and expect me to —”

“Lena, listen to me!” His hands squeezed her arms. “You’re wound so tightly, worrying about every little thing, trying so hard to hang on to control, but you never were in control to begin with. It’s an illusion. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you’ll put everything into God’s hands and find some peace and maybe even get some sleep at night.” He released her and lifted the sack. “Now will you drive me into town, or should I ride my bicycle?”

She stared at him. She wasn’t going to win. Europe was at war, and Pieter was going away for training. “I’ll drive you,” she said, then threw herself into his arms, hugging him tightly one last time.

She woke Wim and Maaike and told them to get dressed for school while she was gone. A cloud of dust billowed behind the truck as Lena drove Pieter into the village —like the billowing clouds of war that were quickly overshadowing the Continent. The other five farmers who’d enlisted along with Pieter were already at the station, waiting for the train. Lena knew all of these men and the families they were leaving behind. Did their wives hate this decision as much as she did?

Lena couldn’t wait for the train. She had to get home to her children and her chores. “I’ll write,” Pieter said as they kissed goodbye. “I love you.”

Lena nodded, her heart too sorrowful for words.

CHAPTER 9

Miriam lowered her head against the wind as she hurried to her apartment. She usually enjoyed the freedom of walking everywhere in this pretty city, watching the boats on the glittering canals or winding through the maze of centuries-old cobblestone streets and imagining how she would share all these things with Avi. But November had brought weather that was cold and damp, along with shorter days. The sun set by late afternoon, and Abba had to walk home from the university in the dark. She knew Leiden wasn’t like Cologne, with gangs that randomly attacked Jews, but the memory of what her cousin Saul had endured made her stomach churn whenever Abba was late.