The joy Ans had felt a moment ago was swept away by grief. None of them spoke as they walked through the cemetery to his grave. She saw the rawness of their grief as well. His grave beside Oma’s made his death real to Ans but no less painful. The Nazis had been angels of death, sweeping thousands, millions of innocent people to their graves.

“Don’t hate them,” Mama said as if reading Ans’s mind. “They’ll win if we hate them.”

Papa put his arm around her shoulder. “Let’s go home.” Wim loaded her bicycle onto the truck, and they drove down the familiar road to the farm, all six of them crowded into the cab. “So . . . all my children made it through the war,” Papa said.

“Yes. We all made it,” Ans replied.

“Thank God. Thank God.”

After lunch, Ans sat in the front room with her mother and sisters, trying to catch up on all they’d missed in the years since they’d seen each other. The room seemed smaller to Ans than when she was a child, but the warmth of her memories and the love she felt from her mother, seated beside her, could have heated the entire farmhouse. Maaike and Bep sat side by side on the piano bench, the little one concentrating as if learning to play was of utmost importance. “She loves music,” Mama said. “She always has.”

“I see that. But what’s wrong with our piano? It sounds terrible.”

Mama smiled. “I’ll show you when they’re finished.”

“When I was in prison,” Ans said, “I longed to see you and tell you how sorry I was for fighting with you. And for leaving the church.”

“None of that matters. You’re here now, and all is forgotten.”

“There were so many other things I wanted to tell you. I met someone before the war. Erik and I fell in love, and I thought we would spend our lives together.”

“Did he die?” Mama asked, her voice soft.

“No. But it would have been no less painful if he had. He was a policeman in Leiden, and when the Nazis came, he worked for them. At first he thought he was simply adjusting to new commanders. He didn’t want to be sent to a work camp, and he thought he could still be a good policeman. But the Nazis kept demanding more and more, and he gave in. He helped them round up Jews like Elisheva’s parents and grandfather. He helped raid homes where Jews were hiding and arrested everyone. He stood by while Nazis tortured people. In the end, it broke my heart to realize that Erik had collaborated with the Nazis because he was selfish. He didn’t care about others. He only wanted to save himself.”

“I’m so sorry, Ans. You’ve suffered so much.”

“We all have, Mama.” Her words rested heavily in the room.