Today, I am confident and calm; today, I am confident and calm. I repeat this to myself as I practise my box breathing. Through the tube doors, in for four. Squashed into the corner, hold for four. Actually, this is a scenario in which holding my breath has multiple advantages. Breathe, breathe, breathe. Don’t forget to breathe. And if you can call yourself a guru and make a multi million pound fortune from telling people that, I never need to worry that any of my pitch ideas are ever stupid or ridiculous. Out for four. I am confident and calm on the escalator, on the pavement, and even when I collide with Tabitha as I trip over her tiered skirt, while trying to stride, confidently and calmly, into the building. ‘Fuck’s sake, please, I really don’t—look, I gotta go,’ she hangs up her phone and scowls at me. ‘What did you hear?’ She sounds…almost frightened. Is there something different about her voice? I can’t put my finger on it. ‘Um, what? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.’ As always, I’m distracted by her outfit—the yellow taffeta is topped by a velvet jacket, a ruffled silk blouse—half Beauty, half Beast, very Austin Powers. Meanly, I think it would be a lot of fun to watch her attempt the revolving doors. I’m not sure she could even get through the emergency exit, to be honest.

‘Well, I’m sure no one told you that it’s rude to eavesdrop, and I know it’s too much to expect you to walk with any grace or decorum, but will you mind my Molly Goddard?’ Her face shifts, from snarl to sneer, and she picks up her phone and walks away from the office. What was that?

In for four. Confident and calm carries me to Harri’s desk. Make a statement. Show you’re in control, said the Sam Strong books. ‘Good morning! I’ve been working on some ideas and I can’t wait to present them in the meeting. I’ve been looking at all the responses we’re getting on social and it’s so interesting to see how we’re being read, who The Girl is actually…’

‘No need!’ Harri holds her hands up. Her eyes are glittering.

‘Imogen, we’ve got a brilliant assignment for you! You’re off to an orgy!’

Pardon?

‘Oh, but…’ I clutch the notebook. In for four. Hold for one. In for one. Out for one. In for half. ‘I really wanted to…I thought…I worked so hard…’