She leaned in so I could hear her over the music. “It was cool to see you out there tonight, being a little silly.” Her eyes dipped for a moment, then found mine again, which made me look away. “I thought maybe Kat made you a bit uncomfortable back at the bar. She’s a bit drunker than usual tonight.”

I took a sip of my beer, hyperaware now that Shanti had shifted so that her body was tucked in against mine. Responding to both her comment and her closeness, a small spike of steel rose in my chest. “I can handle myself.”

I could feel her lean in even more, and I willed the steel to grow higher, sharper. “I’m sure you can. It doesn’t mean you have to.”

What do you know? “Sometimes you do—have to,” I said, an edge beneath my voice.

“Like when?”

I knew she was looking at me, that unassuming expression on her face, but this conversation felt too close, too dangerous. My brain could tell she wasn’t messing with me, but that spike loomed near my throat.

I turned my eyes toward her, hard. “Like when people try and fuck with you.”

Her eyebrows rose ever so slightly and her body shifted away from mine a little.

There you go. Now you’re getting the hint. Keep moving.

But then: “That’s one way to do it, I guess.”

“Is there another way?”

She smiled a little. Actually smiled. I couldn’t believe it. “There’re lots of different ways.” She shrugged like this was obvious and adjusted her glasses.

To combat the confusion and affection pulling at me, I responded with defensiveness. “Are you laughing at me?”

She surprised me again. “You know I’m not.”

Fuck. Okay. None of my usual stuff was getting in the way here. My next move would usually be to leave, but my feet remained still in their skates. I found myself terrified but wanting to stay. My throat tightened around my words and I couldn’t get any more out.

We were silent for a few seconds. Then Shanti touched my arm and pointed out at the rink. “Check out Alma and Joe—they’re on fire!”

I could tell she was changing the subject, probably for my benefit, and I let her. I followed her finger to see Alma and Joe twirling and dipping around the rink like they were twenty years old—Alma laughing while Joe beamed at her.

As I watched them, some of the terror fell away and my throat opened enough to utter, “Those two are amazing.” Suddenly wanting to make up for my sharpness, I added, “They helped me practice for the tryouts.”

“They did? You asked them to?”

She looked genuinely surprised, and instead of bugging me, it felt like a win. “Yeah—I needed a bit of help around the whole team thing.”

“Really?”