We head back to Instant Paradise. We walk a little apart from each other, giggling sporadically. I didn’t know I was going to use the key to the café other than to lock up the place. There is some light coming out of the café. Strange, it should be closed. I push the key into the lock. Click, I get an inexplicable bad feeling in my gut.

“Hyunmi, don’t come in. Wait out here.” I slowly and quietly open the worn door to the café; the cobalt-blue paint is scratched off here and there. When I look inside, I notice a tipped-over backpack, Geography and Ethics textbooks spilling out of it.

In the back corner near the DJ booth no one uses, the glaring butcher shop lighting is cast on Sungyun. His sweatpants are at his ankles, he’s leaning forward, his glutes flexed, looking like hunks of meat. He’s holding his penis like a pole made of meat. A girl with her black skirt pulled up to her chin is lying before him, her exposed lower body writhing. I place my hand over my mouth, start to close the door, and Sungyun turns toward me. Did he see that it was me? I feel his pupils tremble like the needle of the butcher shop scale weighing a cut of pork.

I grab Hyunmi’s hand, my face feels cold, and we run down the stairs. Hyunmi suggests going to her car. The fume of her hot breath spills out of her mouth. We get into her car, and I lean into the seat. My head feels as foggy as the windshield.

“Yeoul, let’s go see the sea.”

I don’t respond.

“Let’s go see the nighttime beach, go for a walk. I know it’s cold but it will be nice, no?”

“No thanks. I don’t feel like it.”

“Do you want the radio on?”

“No.”

Hyunmi pouts. “We haven’t seen each other for a long time, and like a miracle, we ran into each other. So why are you sullen? Aren’t you happy to see me? Don’t you know how much I liked you? Remember all the snacks, bento boxes, gifts, letters I gave you?” She chatters on.