Back A Terrible Kindness
Chapters (77)
  1. Landing Page
  2. A TERRIBLE KINDNESS
  3. Dedication
  4. Contents
  5. ABERFAN
  6. 1
  7. 2
  8. 3
  9. 4
  10. 5
  11. 6
  12. 7
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. 10
  16. 11
  17. CAMBRIDGE CHOIR
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. FAMILY BUSINESS
  38. 31
  39. 32
  40. 33
  41. 34
  42. 35
  43. 36
  44. 37
  45. 38
  46. 39
  47. 40
  48. 41
  49. 42
  50. 43
  51. 44
  52. 45
  53. 46
  54. 47
  55. 48
  56. 49
  57. MIDNIGHT CHOIR
  58. 50
  59. 51
  60. 52
  61. 53
  62. 54
  63. 55
  64. 56
  65. 57
  66. 58
  67. ABERFAN
  68. 59
  69. 60
  70. 61
  71. 62
  72. 63
  73. 64
  74. 65
  75. Acknowledgements
  76. About the Author
  77. Copyright

At that, Evelyn’s body stiffened. All her agitation and frustration seemed to concentrate on her stillness. She studied William’s face as if Howard and Robert weren’t there any more. ‘Are you going to hold that moment against me until the day I die?’ she asked softly.

William shrugged, worrying that if he spoke, he’d lose his resolve.

‘You know, William, I think I miss you as much as I miss your father. I don’t know where he’s gone, but the boy I raised has disappeared.’

He really thought he might be about to cry, and for some reason, at that moment, he knew this must be avoided at all costs. He turned his back on all of them, climbed the stairs, closed the door to his room, and sat on the bed.

‘Evelyn, this was not my doing.’ Robert’s voice eventually broke the hostile silence. ‘I’ve never encouraged him and I’ve never countenanced him staying here beyond this week. This … this determination has come from him alone.’

‘You say that’ – William recognised his mother’s tone; shaky but steely all at once – ‘but ever since he was born, you’ve wanted to get your hands on him. I’ve seen the way you look at him, like he’s yours!’

‘Really, Evelyn?’ said Howard, with an edge of anger in his voice. ‘Still this? You know, the tragedy is that Paul adored you. You never had anything to be jealous of.’

‘I did!’ she batted back. ‘I was jealous of how you came swanning into this family with enough love for everyone when I only seemed to have enough for Paul and William. You made me look as if I never had enough love.’ There was a pause, then: ‘What are you grimacing at, Robert?’

‘Do you want William to hear this?’ Robert replied.

‘Of course I don’t!’ She raised her voice. ‘But what I want and what I get rarely match up, Robert. I want my son to come and live with me, but evidently he doesn’t.’

‘So what are we going to do?’ Robert said. ‘Frogmarch him to the car?’

During the next silence, William found himself worrying that they hadn’t even offered her a cup of tea. It was three hours from Wales to here. She must have been thirsty, and hungry. William tasted salt in the corner of his mouth. He wiped his face.

Then her feet were running up the stairs and his door opened so fast, he jumped. Her eyes were hectic, but she stood in the doorway composed, and when she spoke, it was slow and calm.