BooksBarbecue
Back When We Were Bright and Beautiful
Chapters (72)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. Part One
  5. 1
  6. 2
  7. 3
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. 8
  13. 9
  14. 10
  15. 11
  16. 12
  17. 13
  18. 14
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. 18
  23. 19
  24. Part Two
  25. 20
  26. 21
  27. 22
  28. 23
  29. 24
  30. 25
  31. 26
  32. 27
  33. 28
  34. 29
  35. 30
  36. 31
  37. 32
  38. 33
  39. 34
  40. 35
  41. 36
  42. Part Three
  43. 37
  44. 38
  45. 39
  46. 40
  47. 41
  48. 42
  49. 43
  50. 44
  51. 45
  52. 46
  53. 47
  54. 48
  55. 49
  56. 50
  57. 51
  58. 52
  59. 53
  60. 54
  61. 55
  62. 56
  63. 57
  64. 58
  65. 59
  66. 60
  67. Epilogue
  68. Author’s Note
  69. Acknowledgments
  70. About the Author
  71. Also by Jillian Medoff
  72. About the Publisher

It sure can, I agree, lacing up my sneakers, grabbing my coat. Thank you; you’re very nice, thank you; goodbye. I race out of there feeling nothing.

I text him. Then I wait.

I’m sixteen and one-quarter. No longer a kid. A woman who knows her own mind. A woman who’s seen hard times. And just like that, something shifts.

Marcus replies: I miss you. I miss the ducks.

Marcus calls. “You weaken me.”

Finally, I think.

The next time we meet, he kisses me, hard. I want you; he tells me. I’ve wanted you for so long. I can’t stop myself. I can’t help myself.

No way, I think. I can’t tell Avery any of this. I realize my nails are dry. She’s watching me. “Let’s get a drink,” I say instead.

“Let’s.” She pauses. “Cassie, I—”

“Yes?” I look up. If I were a better person, I’d say, I’m sorry, Avery. I really screwed up. I lost my mind and here’s how it happened.

“Billy will be okay,” she says.

“Thanks, Avery. Your hair looks amazing. It’s perfectly you. I’ll text you,” I add, which I mean sincerely, but she’s already out the door and back on the street.

31

THE NEXT NIGHT, LAWRENCE AND I ARE IN THE KITCHEN, FORAGING for food. He’s eating Oreos, half a sleeve, one at a time. Seeing Avery has put me in a foul mood I can’t shake. But Lawrence is pissing me off too. Sometimes all it takes is the sound of him chewing to trigger my rage.

“Where’s Eleanor?” he asks, looking around. I nod at the terrace. “With Nate. They’re both brooding.”

“In the dark?” At the French doors, he watches her through the glass. “She’s smoking again,” he says absently, as if addressing a studio audience. “She promised to quit. Now look.”

“Everyone makes promises, Lawrence. Give her a break.” I take raspberries, blueberries, and blackberries out of the refrigerator and cut them into a fruit salad. He plucks a blueberry from my collection and puts it in his mouth.

I snatch my bowl out of his reach. “These are mine,” I say. “Get your own.”

“Oh wow, Princess, you’re selfish.”

He’s teasing but I won’t engage. “Maybe I am. What of it?” Behind me, he puts both his hands on my shoulders, requesting a truce. I shrug him off.

“Why are you mad at me?” he asks. “What did I do?”

“I’m not mad. I’m not anything. I just think you’re wrong about Billy.”

“I got that memo, Cassie. Your opinion has been registered with the committee. But I’m closer to the case than you are. I speak to Peter every day. Not for nothing, but you’ve been out of town all summer.”