The return varies.

I cannot confirm or deny the luxuries.

To see through all things. To see all things so deeply.

A harsh power one can hope for,

and regret at the same time.

When i first began writing poetry it was an effortless duty. I’d form words and create stories, pulling from both feelings and experiences, that were no longer a reality in the present. Often i go back and i don’t remember anything. 20 years of purging—well done. At 26 I have no recollection. The thing about me is, after i grieve, i isolate myself from the process of healing. I only take my badge with me. Moving forward, and beyond, toward the next process. onto the next project. then again.

I wish it were easier to sit still.

student things

you think you know

discipline, patience,

empathy, and strength..

until you give birth

to your teacher.

help me sing

what i’ve learned

is, i discern best in

the dark. it’s hard

to be candid

under bright lights

what i’ve learned

is distractions don’t

always come in flesh.

heartbreak

doesn’t always

come with healing.

holding grudges

for a moment,

adds more lives to you.

the karma brings

you back a few times.

tears cleanse the soul.

pain is a magnet

pay attention to

what attracts to you.

pay attention to

what y’all birth.

pay attention

to your baby.

you gave her life.

master lessons

you cannot evolve

while holding onto

those who are incapable.

in this life

we tend to get caught up in the aesthetic of things. we learn to care about reputation before self preservation. we fall in love behind closed doors. we laugh at jokes that we could never say aloud—due to the fear of being seen. scared to be ourselves. scared being ourselves will never make the cut. at some point, we became too serious. we’ve labeled everything as problematic. we’ve forgotten how to mind the business that pays us. i’ve learned to be accepting of it all. the love, the hate, the neglect, the skepticism, the criticism, the praise, and everything in between. i’ve never cared to be anyone’s favorite. i don’t believe i’m here for that. my purpose is quite simple. break generational curses. escape generational trauma. speak the truth—as i know it. share my journey as i go. give reference and resources if possible. connect the dots for others. connect others—with each other. be a source of light. raise a village with, and of, love. leave control behind. leave judgment behind. leave baggage behind. and most importantly, pay dues to karmic debt. i can’t say the same for you, but i’m ready to ascend. i’m ready to be a hummingbird or a tree. i wanna be freer than this lifetime’s freedom. stuck no longer resonates. no longer stuck in the matrix of distraction.

i wanna get out for good.

off course

you can never be who you’re meant to be

if you’re worried about how people

will view you every step of the way.