Chapters (46)
‘OK …’ He backs away, looking as confused as I am about the hostility coming off me – but I’ve committed to it now and the fire in me doesn’t seem to want to be extinguished just yet. ‘I’ve got some work to do so I’ll just …’ He backs away, turning off his all-important FIFA game.
‘Oh,’ I nod, walking past him and taking in his jogging bottoms and sweater – he’s literally been vegging out all day and now I’m here to play the dutiful wife role. ‘I’ll make dinner then, shall I?’
‘I thought you’d have eaten?’
‘When?’ I bark.
‘Za … babe,’ he holds his hands up in the air, telling me he comes in peace. It angers me further.
‘You’re all right, Liam. You just do you,’ I say, my arm gesticulating wildly between us. ‘Don’t worry about me.’
‘Are you hungry?’
‘What?’ I choke.
‘You get cranky when you’re hungry,’ he shrugs.
‘I’m cranky ’coz life is shit sometimes and you don’t seem to care.’
His jaw drops then closes in quick succession, his eyes narrow.
‘What are you doing?’ he asks, giving me some fire back.
‘You’ve been sat there all day, and now you’re going to go and do work?’
‘I don’t need to work,’ he says, shaking his head.
‘You just said you did.’
‘You made it crystal clear you didn’t want me around as soon as you walked in the door so I was going to give you some space,’ he says.
‘I don’t need space!’ I yell.
We stare at each other – me frowning, him totally taken aback.
‘Zaza,’ he says, his voice low and calm as both of his hands rest on his chest. ‘You know this isn’t about me or us. Be as angry as you like at the world, but this isn’t about me, and you can’t go throwing grenades into our relationship because life got shit. We’re getting married. There’s going to be a whole load of shit thrown our way in the decades to come and we need to be able to work it out together,’ he says, his face full of sympathy and concern. ‘We don’t do this. This is rubbish!’
‘I know,’ I agree, matching his tone, feeling the steam ease off now some of it’s been released. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘I know it’s been a hard day. I’m trying to get vibes off you and go with what you’re feeling. Not pushing or prodding, just letting you be with this …’
‘Yeah …’
He sighs and cocks his head to the side, his eyes still studying me.
‘Want to get a pizza and watch something?’
I nod.
He steps forward and wraps his arms around me. I succumb to the warmth and allow myself to feel comforted by his love.
For a moment.
‘I’ll go put my pjs on.’