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Chapters (60)
  1. Cover
  2. Books by Sheryl Browne
  3. Dedication
  4. KARLA
  5. One
  6. Two
  7. Three
  8. Four
  9. Five
  10. Six
  11. Seven
  12. Eight
  13. Nine
  14. Ten
  15. Eleven
  16. Twelve
  17. Thirteen
  18. Fourteen
  19. Fifteen
  20. Sixteen
  21. Seventeen
  22. Eighteen
  23. Nineteen
  24. Twenty
  25. Twenty-One
  26. Twenty-Two
  27. Twenty-Three
  28. Twenty-Four
  29. Twenty-Five
  30. Twenty-Six
  31. Twenty-Seven
  32. Twenty-Eight
  33. Twenty-Nine
  34. Thirty
  35. Thirty-One
  36. Thirty-Two
  37. Thirty-Three
  38. Thirty-Four
  39. Thirty-Five
  40. Thirty-Six
  41. Thirty-Seven
  42. Thirty-Eight
  43. Thirty-Nine
  44. Forty
  45. Forty-One
  46. Forty-Two
  47. Forty-Three
  48. Forty-Four
  49. Forty-Five
  50. Forty-Six
  51. Forty-Seven
  52. Forty-Eight
  53. Epilogue
  54. The Affair
  55. Hear more from Sheryl
  56. Books by Sheryl Browne
  57. A Letter from Sheryl
  58. The Babysitter
  59. The Second Wife
  60. Acknowledgements

‘Don’t.’ She’d recoiled in an instant, staggering and very nearly doing what he was trying to avoid. ‘Just don’t. Please.’ That had hurt, that she found his touch so unbearable.

She wouldn’t even look at him.

Trying not to imagine how she would feel if she knew all there was to know about him, he sucked in a breath and concentrated on his cleaning endeavours, glancing up at their son as he did. Josh was doing as he’d asked, pouring the milk carefully on his Coco Pops and then shaking the carton close to his ear to check he’d left enough milk for his mum. He didn’t ask where she was. Neither of them did. They knew she would make an appearance eventually.

‘We’ll be late, Dad,’ Holly reminded him, collecting up her bowl and heading for the bin to scrape most of the contents away. Jason felt for her. He hadn’t realised how useless he was at this. He’d never had to do it, other than the odd few times. He would improve. He had to. Wherever he might end up, he had no intention of losing touch with his kids. At one point, he’d felt they were all he had to live for.

‘I know. Don’t worry, I’ll ring the school and explain.’ Straightening up, Jason mustered a smile. ‘Go up and brush your teeth, sweetheart. I won’t be long.’

Sighing, Holly walked across to the dishwasher. ‘Are you going to shave?’ she asked him, a concerned frown crossing her face as she looked him over.

‘I’ll do it in the office,’ he assured her, aware that his own dishevelled appearance was probably as destabilising for them as everything else. ‘Go on, scoot. You, too, Josh. And don’t forget to brush properly – with toothpaste.’

‘I won’t,’ Josh said through a mouthful of Coco Pops, as if he didn’t regularly forget. ‘I’m still eating.’

‘Well, hurry up.’ Holly shot him a despairing glance as she headed for the hall. ‘Dad has to go to work.’

Watching her go, Jason felt his heart sink. She was sounding more grown up every day, because she felt she had to be, that it was her responsibility to be adult around grown-ups who were acting like children. Having felt exactly that way as a child, it was the last thing Jason had wanted for his kids, but he had no way to fix it.

‘Oh.’ Holly stopped at the kitchen door. ‘Morning,’ she said, sounding majorly unimpressed.