I measure as a size six, but because of my height I generally have to buy size eight clothes. Which is why making my own works much better for me. Also, finding dresses with the level of coverage I like usually involves me looking like a frump, or having some random key-hole detail somewhere pivotal, like on the back above the zip. A pointless and very annoying detail when you have a hairy back and shoulders.

On top of this, I have quite long arms. I need a thirty-three-centimetre sleeve, which most brands do not accommodate. My dress pattern is unique to my body and satisfies both my need to be protected and my desire to be stylish.

A while ago I purchased a large roll of slightly stretchy crimson velvet. It’s a vibrant colour. I have been saving it for a special occasion. Maybe Lauren Pearce’s wedding is that occasion? I realise I won’t be at the main event, that I will be in a back room working – and I’m relieved that I won’t have to socialise – but that doesn’t mean I can’t step up with my dress, does it? The best thing about my design is that the velvet is very soft and comfortable. I could sleep in it. Not that I would. But working for an entire day in it is not a problem. The only issue is the heat. I’ll find a way to deal with that on the day.

I cut a pattern following the outline of the black one that I made in high school and cut the fabric to size with my traditional shears. I do this every time, I really enjoy the process. I stitch it all together on my Singer sewing machine, putting a light lining in, to avoid any friction. I add a slightly larger puff on each shoulder, for some extra drama. The sleeves are a little longer with tighter elastic so they don’t ride up at all. I will be fully hirsute at this wedding, and whether I am alone in a room or not, I cannot take the risk of exposing myself.

All in all, the dress takes me four and a half hours to make. It’s an evening of my life well spent, to produce an outfit that will have me living confidently outside of my house. I put it on and look at myself in the full-length mirror in my bedroom. The colour is exciting and the fit is perfect. I’ll wear this one a lot, I am sure.