I instantly feel sick, imagining the possibilities of what might have happened if the email was delivered to me on that day. Would Joel and I have got together? Would our relationship have lasted? My brain instantly goes back to the very night my world turned upside down, and I think about how so much of that night could have been prevented: the days of feeling hurt from Joel’s sudden disappearing act; the excessive drinking to forget my troubles yet still my desperate need to see Joel; finding Elizabeth in his room and having my heart torn in two; worrying Mum enough for her to jump in the car to check up on me.

The train starts to slow and I search the landscape outside, no clue as to where we are.

The man opposite me stands up and slips his jacket on. ‘Excuse me, what’s the next stop?’

‘Westerly.’

I thank him as I hastily shove my phone into my bag and rise to my feet, gripping the tops of the headrests as I walk to the doors. The train comes to a halt and I follow the other passengers, walking on autopilot. All I can think about is Joel and the lines of that email. I’m vaguely aware of someone yelling and it takes a moment to realise it’s my name being shouted.

‘Edie, Edie,’ calls Soph. I wave back but my feet don’t want to move.

She walks up and gives me a quick hug.

‘You look tired. I bet you’ve had a long week.’

‘You have no idea.’

‘Your dad still recovering well?’

‘Yes, thank goodness.’

‘Good.’ She links her arm through mine and steers me towards the car park.

‘We’ll go back to ours and have a cup of tea and then I’m making pasta for lunch. Alfie will be pleased to see you.’

‘A cuddle with him might be just what I need. How’s he doing?’

‘He’s good, thanks. He’s really mastered the crawl now, which I was jumping for joy about for all of five minutes until he started crawling everywhere. It’s exhausting trying to run after him.’

She carries on rattling off his exploits but I can’t concentrate. I feel like I’m going to explode if I don’t confide in someone about what I’ve just learnt. Maybe it would help to speak to Soph about everything that happened back then and how I feel now. Besides, I can’t keep it from her any longer.

It doesn’t take us long to arrive back at her place and we pull up onto her driveway. But when we walk into the house, the sound of chattering forces me to stop. I turn to Soph and I go rigid in fear.

‘Oh.’ She looks just as surprised as I do. ‘Sounds like we’ve got company.’