At first, I think he’s clearly playing a cruel trick on me, that, after finding out about my notes to self, he’s sent me an email pretending it’s from the past. But when I scroll up to the details in the header, I realise he sent it seventeen years ago.

My hands start to shake and my heart begins to pound as I try desperately to process it. I’m stunned by the revelation. Joel was in love with me.

I remember the other note-to-self email in my inbox and I click on it, hoping it may shed some insight on what I’ve just read.

Yo, yo, yo my future self!

How’s it all going? I hope your summer didn’t feel like it passed in the blink of an eye like mine has just done. I’ve only got a couple of weeks to go now and I wish that wasn’t the case.

I am still swooning over Joel. He came in to see me in reception earlier and it’s been so quiet here on the desk that I actually thought that this was going to be a good moment to talk about our almost kiss. I’ve been working myself up to confess how I feel AND just as I’d plucked up the courage as well, a guest chose the perfect time to come into reception and I had to check them out of the caravan. By the time I got back here, Joel had buggered off. Charming, huh?

Anyway, I will talk to him. Which brings me to the note to self for today – stop putting off conversations that you need to have. I know that I do it with everything in life, but don’t put it off, do it today.

I’m going to do this one too – really I am – wish me luck and all the bravery in the world.

Edie x x

I close my eyes as all the pieces fall into place. Joel didn’t know that he was sending the email to the future.

I can’t quite believe it. Joel told me he loved me and I never received the email. He was waiting for me to answer him and I never did. No wonder he was acting weirdly around me. I don’t know how I would have reacted if roles were reversed and he was ignoring my declaration of love. I wonder if that was why he slept with Elizabeth, which now makes me feel a bit sorry for her as I think she really liked him.