hi edie, surprise! it’s me joel. i know what you’re thinking, why am i sending you an email, especially as i’m sat in reception whilst you’ve gone off to check a caravan inventory and i know you’re going to be back any minute. bollocks if you’re reading this and i’m still in the room – do not read any further. please!

if however you’re reading this and i have gone, then that’s OK. i’ve actually been wanting to talk to you for some time, but i have bottled it up so much that i thought if i wrote it to you it might be easier. i tried to write you a letter, but i didn’t think you’d be able to read the scrawl and also i worried douglas or soph would get hold of it and they’d rip the piss out of me forever more. then when we were chatting here on reception and you got called away i saw you’d left your email open, and your email address was there, i thought it was a sign.

ok, i should probably tell you what i want to say now before i lose my courage.

from almost the first time i met you i’ve known you were something special. or almost the first time i met you, when I sobered up and realised what was going on. i thought at first it was because you were cool and we got on so well. obviously you were with scott and we became such good friends and i thought that being friends was enough for me. but every time we’re together, i fall for you a little bit more. i’ve never found anyone that gets me or my humour, like when there’s that tumbleweed moment where no one else in the conversation laughs and then you do your laugh where you bark like a sea lion – the one that’s all spontaneous, and honestly, there’s no better sound. and then there was that moment we had in my room, before we were interrupted by soph, and i really, really wanted to kiss you. i guess this is a bit of a rambling mess and i’m not making any sense, but i’m terrified you’re going to come back and catch me in the act as it were. so, look, i’m laying all my cards on the table. edie, i have fallen for you and i wanted to do one of those grand gestures, the ones they do in those romantic comedies you love so much, but honestly i’m already breaking out into hives as i write this email, so there’s no way i could do anything as big. but just know that this is that moment, and even though it doesn’t compare to anything like the movies, to me this is huge. i’ve never told anyone that i’ve fallen in love with them before. and i’ve certainly not written a love letter to anyone.

so that’s how i feel, i guess the next stage is up to you. you can put me out of my misery and let me know how you feel (either way).

love

joel