2:58am: taking the long way home through Baltimore. On 50mg vyvanse, got distracted by twitter conversation as I sat in my room and then my mom’s floor as she watched ‘the graduate.’ heard emotional/weepy noises coming from bed, where I thought mom had fallen asleep. Watched last scene together and felt affected. Last scene reminds me of last scene in ‘mumblecore’ when Tao and I are in the car after getting married. Earlier tonight Tao emailed that he wanted to get a divorce when he had more money via things being complicated with taxes and explaining marital status to people. I replied ‘sweet, sounds good.’ smells like Mrs. Meyers lemon hand soap in my car. Soap is near the air vent and the heat is on high. I forget when I bought it but the bottle is a little less than half-used. Zachary and I had it in our bathroom. It never fit on the sink very well.

6:51am: ate another 50mg vyvannse when I arrived at Dad’s. Unpacked and hung ‘temporary clothes for the few weeks I’ll be here.’ Responded late to an email from Jordan. Have been sitting at kitchen table, reformatting liveblog, pressing ‘enter’ key and dreading seeing spinning rainbow circle since maybe a little after 4am. Now sitting in car for a cigarette break. Thought, in a combination of David Bowie and Donovan’s voice, like, this was sung jauntily: ‘when mailman calls then the mail is due for the muppet boys at the muppet zoo.’ Chewed 15mg adderall with front teeth.

7:01am: car is getting warmer. Lighting second cigarette. Keep mentally replaying mailman David Bowie song thing. Alvie has been loudly running around and meowing at a rate probably five meows every two minutes. Insatiable. The Insatiable Alvie and his traveling shitshow of terrible fiendish delights. Worried dad is going to wake and use his computer and see liveblog. An older Asian woman in shiny matching hot pink pants and jacket seems to be dragging two almost identical small dogs into dad’s building.

Things to do today:

•  drop off computer at macmedics

•  write and mail gyno letter

•  emails, as many as you can