But even as those words cross my mind, I rebuke them. No, it won’t be that simple. They’ll want me to pay for it. That’s the way in Thorn Falls. Lily had to kiss Cross to get that fake picture erased. Keller convinced me to kiss him by dangling something I couldn’t resist either.

They will make me pay for my right to remain here.

This man is just allowing them to do so.

But I told the truth. There’s nothing I won’t do to avoid being expelled from the best college in the state, on this coast, maybe in the country. Especially since I can’t afford to go anywhere else.

Whatever the council wants to do with me, I’ll have to submit to their will.

15. Claire

15

CLAIRE

I really wish Lily were around when I head back to our dorm room, to keep me sane, and maybe prep me again.

The board member—I don’t even know his name—said ten at the Vesper house. Even planning to arrive a good fifteen minutes early, I know there’s no point in leaving before a quarter past nine; the Vesper House is right next to the Wyvern House, and it took about half an hour to walk there yesterday. That means, time to waste.

I know I should eat, but the very thought of food makes me nauseous.

In the absence of my advisor, I opt for an outfit change. And a shower, first. I need something to do to combat the anxiety.

I frankly don’t know if the board meeting clothing choices are appropriate for a student council meeting. I guess Lily was trying to help me look like a good girl for whatever old guy sat on the board. She likely didn’t picture a near-perfect Henry Cavill lookalike. I may not be the best at fashion advice, but my personal experience says the good girl vibe doesn’t tend to work on people my age.

After the longest shower I’ve ever taken, which does little to soothe my nerves, although I cry twice, I slowly blow dry my hair, a painstaking yet completely useless endeavor as it’s raining tonight. It’s all about wasting time. Then I braid my hair. It’s only eight thirty when I’m done, so I apply some makeup. I don’t even try to do the sort of magic Lily worked on me, sticking to my usual pale, boring shades. Then, I get dressed in a pink skirt and white blouse. A little less formal than my earlier clothing, but nothing like yesterday’s outfit.