He didn’t remember getting home. His next memory was the innings being interrupted by the phone ringing. It was after eight o’clock and George ignored it, and the first couple of timid knocks on the door. The phone didn’t stop, though, and the knocks grew more insistent. They forced him from his chair, propelled him to the door, where he yelled, ‘She’s not here. She’s dead. Now fuck off.’ It had been Barbara, wondering why Ellen hadn’t come to their weekly Knit and Natter.

George had watched her run, for the first time in twenty years, down the road to Sue’s and pound on the door. When Sue finally opened it, Barbara had panted, ‘Quick! Call the police! He’s finally done it. George has murdered Ellen.’

Dan

(Crossing the line)

THEY SIT ON THE sofa in silence as Rufus sings about a ‘Foolish Love’, and Dan has to close his eyes because the lyrics are too close to home. He can feel Atticus looking at him, watching for the green light to make a move. From so close, Dan can make out a small scar by his left ear. He wants to put his finger on it. He wants to be the other Dan, who is brave enough to close the gap between them and kiss Atticus, but it’s late, and he’s tired, and the Elvis Dan has left the building.

‘I’d better go.’ He pulls back and jumps up, almost knocking over the bottle of wine in his haste. Atticus says nothing but discreetly adjusts his crotch before standing. Dan tries and fails not to notice. Instead, he babbles into the awkward silence. ‘Fitz is home alone. He’ll need a wee-wee soon, and I have work tomorrow. Thanks for dinner and the food and …’ He doesn’t know what else to say. He can’t believe he just said the word ‘wee-wee’. Oh, God, what a car crash, and all Dan can think is wee-wee, wee-wee, wee-wee, over and over in his head, like a stuck record.

When Atticus opens the door to let Dan escape, he doesn’t manoeuvre himself so that Dan has to duck under his arm. He opens it wide and the smell of the candles and dinner and their mutual disappointment seeps out into the hall.

Dan takes the stairs two at a time, still wee-weeing as he goes. He forces himself not to run until he is out of sight, then he sprints. The food and the wine churn in his gut and he wants to be sick almost as much as he wants to go home.

He unlocks the car with shaking fingers and dives in.

The image of Atticus adjusting his crotch makes it hard for Dan to catch his breath and it takes him two attempts to start the car.