The sick fluttering around my heart didn’t stop as Eileen ran through the really important stuff of what I would wear, where she’d get the white robe for Serena, who would I like for godparents. Had I ever managed to get back in touch with that mad pal of mine, Lizzie Magee? Would John be able to stretch to a sandwich tea after in the parish hall or would we just come home and make tea? Why hadn’t she asked him when the two of them were scheming behind my back? I swallowed my cake and hoped it would choke me. It didn’t.

–  We’ll come home and make tea, I manage.

–  Great! I’ve booked it for Sunday! It’ll be a blast! says my faithful aunt.

I didn’t sleep on the Saturday night. I lay beside the little innocent bundle of Serena snuffling beside me. I was going to let Father O’Brien, the big fat liar, anoint her head with holy oil and swear that she would be a follower of the Catholic faith. Kathleen and Matthew were standing up as godparents after Auntie Eileen had refused to renounce the World, the Flesh and the Devil. Why would I give up the good stuff? she’d asked, lighting a fag.

In the end, I got up and went out to get a better look at the moon that was shining through the curtains. It hung, a glorious silver ball between the shadows of the big sycamores at the entrance to the river field. The leaves shivered alongside me and the soil was cold and dense beneath my bare feet. The Cloon was flowing fast, washing the stones smooth by the bend. Nothing was stirring on the air except my breath. It was as if I had the whole world to myself. What if I slipped into the river and let it carry me away from Johns Farm? It was only the thought of my girl that made me turn back and get to my bed.

In the morning, I walked out with Serena draped in her long white lace dress. She was a picture and a half. Auntie Eileen had done her proud; it was a confection all its own. I kept my eyes on my girl’s face for the journey up the lane, past The Hill, past my father who was standing by the door of the chapel, past my mother who was already ensconced in the front pew. I had a crick in my neck after the whole hour of the Mass but when I left my daughter was a Catholic and everyone seemed happier, especially John. He took her from my arms as I stepped out of the door and into the bright June sunshine.