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Chapters (59)
  1. Bad Friends
  2. Copyright
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. AFTER: DECEMBER
  6. BEFORE: JUNE
  7. Chapter One
  8. Chapter Two
  9. Chapter Three
  10. Chapter Four
  11. Chapter Five
  12. Chapter Six
  13. Chapter Seven
  14. Chapter Eight
  15. Chapter Nine
  16. Chapter Ten
  17. Chapter Eleven
  18. Chapter Twelve
  19. Chapter Thirteen
  20. Chapter Fourteen
  21. Chapter Fifteen
  22. Chapter Sixteen
  23. Chapter Seventeen
  24. Chapter Eighteen
  25. Chapter Nineteen
  26. Chapter Twenty
  27. Chapter Twenty-One
  28. Chapter Twenty-Two
  29. Chapter Twenty-Three
  30. Chapter Twenty-Four
  31. Chapter Twenty-Five
  32. Chapter Twenty-Six
  33. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  34. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  35. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  36. Chapter Thirty
  37. Chapter Thirty-One
  38. Chapter Thirty-Two
  39. Chapter Thirty-Three
  40. Chapter Thirty-Four
  41. Chapter Thirty-Five
  42. Chapter Thirty-Six
  43. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  44. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  45. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  46. Chapter Forty
  47. Chapter Forty-One
  48. Chapter Forty-Two
  49. Chapter Forty-Three
  50. Chapter Forty-Four
  51. Chapter Forty-Five
  52. Chapter Forty-Six
  53. Chapter Forty-Seven
  54. Chapter Forty-Eight
  55. A CONVERSATION WITH CLAIRE SEEBER
  56. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  57. About the Author
  58. By the same author:
  59. About the Publisher

He put his hands on either side of my face and I didn’t flinch this time. He raised my face to meet his and then he bent and kissed me. I felt myself start to relax as his lips met mine. My heart beat faster again, but this time it wasn’t with fear. I looked into his eyes and they were so dark, I still wasn’t used to such very dark eyes. And as I tried to decipher what lay beneath the surface, Seb ran a hand down my cheek and down my neck and on down, on down … He pushed me back onto that enormous bed and ripped the few shirt buttons undone that I’d just done up, and I gasped – but it wasn’t a gasp of fright this time. I kept trying to read his face as he stared down at me, as he slid his hands behind my back and undid the bra I’d just done up. He pulled his own T-shirt off impatiently and I dug my hands into his tousled curls and then I put my hands on his bare chest and the pulse there, it felt like it was too fast, as if he was being consumed by something I didn’t understand. And I knew that if this was ever going to work, I had to let myself go too.

Chapter Thirty-One

Chapter Thirty-One

I slept the sleep of the dead that night. I didn’t dream, I didn’t stir at all until reception rang around seven, saying they’d been asked to wake me. Seb was already gone, a note on the snowy pillow next to me.

Morning gorgeous. Didn’t want to disturb you – you looked so peaceful sleeping. I’ve got a big audition first thing. Keep your fingers crossed for me. And sorry about last night: it was really stupid of me. Call you later x

I lay in bed for a second staring up at Cupid’s little face as he grinned down at me knowingly. The thought came to me that last night was the first time I’d had sober sex in a very, very long time; and then, gradually, as sleep finally dissolved, I remembered Seb’s murmured confession. The fact he’d said he loved me. Slowly, luxuriously, I stretched, and then, very slowly, I smiled.

When I got to the studios Renee and Charlie were already in the green room gorging themselves on Danish pastries meant for the guests. Renee looked pointedly at her Cartier watch.

‘A tardy mind is a lardy mind,’ she said tartly, and popped the final corner of a croissant into her ladylike mouth.

‘You just made that up, surely, Renee.’ I sloshed coffee into a cup. Now they had caught Joseph, I could concentrate on securing my freedom. It had been a long time coming.