‘Is that my dog?’ I recognised danger in Alex’s tone. ‘Have you got my dog with you, Maggie?’

‘Well, where else would he be? Should I have left him at home for you to feed?’ I was too close to the car in front; I braked sharply. ‘Just like you did in the summer. Are you drunk, Alex?’

‘No, I am not fucking drunk,’ he howled. ‘I gave up, I told you. Look, just get the estate agent the keys, would you?’

‘I can’t. I’m on my way to Pendarlin.’

‘With who?’ His tone was icy now. ‘That bloke who just answered the phone? And my dog.’

‘None of your damn business, Alex.’ I swerved slightly in the fast lane; Seb was starting to look worried now. ‘I’ve got to go.’

‘Just get Costana the keys on Monday, all right? And don’t ring me again.’ Alex hung up.

‘He didn’t sound like he was in a very good mood,’ Seb joked, but neither of us laughed. After a minute, he reached out and squeezed my thigh gently. ‘Okay?’

‘I’m fine. Sorry.’ I wasn’t fine, though, not fine at all. I was so angry I was practically crying with rage. I dashed away an imaginary tear. ‘Can I – do you mind if we don’t talk about it right now?’

‘Of course,’ he said softly. ‘I understand.’ He patted me. ‘Exes are a funny thing, eh?’

‘What makes you think he was my ex?’ I asked carefully. I pressed the cigarette lighter in like it was Alex’s face.

‘Isn’t he?’ Seb looked at me and I nodded silently. ‘It’s easy to tell, you know. They have a strange hold over us, I think, sometimes, our ex-lovers. Even if you don’t want to be together any more.’

I didn’t trust myself to speak right then. I just didn’t know how I could have reached such utter depths with someone I’d loved so much. I thought about the moment I’d finally realised that Alex and I weren’t together any more; that he was now my ex. After that disastrous first call from the hospital I’d tried to ring him several more times in the following days – to no avail. I had no recollection of a problem between us at first and I was stupefied. It took two weeks before the fog lifted even a little and the day of the crash began to take shape. And Alex had refused to see me; it was Bel who’d sat beside me and listened as I finally drew what had happened from the depths; it was Bel who filled in the excruciating blanks as best she could, and assured me it might hurt like hell-pains, but it was definitely for the best.

I threw my fag out of the window and tried to forget Alex. Now Seb was here instead.