‘Charlie, you and I both know that if he wasn’t Lyons’s blood, you wouldn’t give him the time of day.’ I leaned forward conspiratorially, and tapped him carefully on the shoulder to emphasise my point. ‘After all, he’s not blonde and big-boobed, is he now?’ I paused to reflect. ‘Well, he is blond, I suppose.’

Charlie stared at me with dispassion; then he smiled roguishly. ‘No, and more’s the pity.’

‘You know, Charlie, you really are incot— incomp—’ I couldn’t seem to grasp the word. ‘Terrible,’ I finished lamely.

He waved a fifty-pound note at the barman. ‘Top us up, there’s a good chap. Call me an old fool, Maggie –’

‘You ol’ fool.’

He ignored me, ‘– but I feel sorry for that boy.’

‘Oh come on, Charlie,’ I spluttered. ‘Bene— bene—’ The word just wouldn’t come.

‘Benny who?’ he frowned. ‘Spit it out.’

‘Benevolence is hardly your forte.’ I swayed backwards triumphantly – and then, luckily, after a second or two, forwards again.

Bored now, Charlie’s hooded eyes darted over my shoulder to see what better prospects lay in store. ‘I really must go and clean up, darling. Blake’s got a bit of a dark past, that’s all I’m at liberty to say. His family are rather desperate, and we’re giving him a chance. But don’t be taken in by him.’

‘What do you mean?’ I suddenly felt rather more sober.

‘Let’s just say he can be a bit –’

‘What? Disingenuous?’

‘You managed that big word, didn’t you? Clever Maggie.’

I glared at him. At least I hoped it was a glare. I was having some trouble actually seeing.

‘Let’s not split hairs, shall we?’ Charlie ran a predatory finger down my cheek. ‘You’re very sexy when you’re cross, you know.’ And he moved off like a sleek cruiser through a throng of pedalos, a nubile blonde in his sights.

The music was getting louder, the pub crowd more rowdy. Bel’s guests were leaving the table now, mingling with the few dancers by the speakers. Digging my phone out of my bag, I squinted at it nervously. It was text-free, thank God. Before I could think about it too hard, I rang Seb, but he didn’t answer so I left a message.

‘If you’ve blocked, can you come down? I want you to meet my very best friend in the world, she’s called Bel. And I’d love to see you, lovely Seb. Whoops.’ Someone knocked the phone out of my hand. I retrieved it from the sticky floor without quite falling over, fortunately. ‘Are you still there? Did I mention that Bel’s my very best friend?’