I didn’t tell Bel everything about Seb. She was my oldest friend; we’d shared every secret since I was eight, and a new man was definitely a subject usually up for debate – but for some reason I kept silent now. Perhaps I was a little ashamed by my rash actions and the fact I hadn’t heard from Seb yet. Perhaps I knew I wasn’t ready: I wasn’t at all sure it was time to get involved with someone new; I didn’t want Bel to emphasise my doubts. Or perhaps we were simply distracted by Hannah’s whinging.

‘You’re not going halfway round the world dressed as Snow White, so don’t even bother, okay?’ Bel snapped when Hannah threw her tracksuit trousers down the stairs in a fit of pique. ‘Sorry, Mag. It’s so hard to concentrate right now.’

‘S’okay,’ I said, and topped up my wine. ‘I’m knackered anyway. I need to go home and look for the key to Pendarlin. I can’t find it anywhere.’ I peered out of the window, through the old magnolia tree in the front garden, looking for the cab I’d called. It was still pouring outside and the street was empty apart from a man unloading shopping from his car and making a dash for his front door. ‘I keep losing everything at the moment. My memory’s still terrible.’

‘You’re not being very forthcoming about this bloke, Mag,’ Bel chided me as I turned back into the room. ‘I want all the juicy details.’

I pretended I hadn’t heard her, pulling the curtain back again. It was so dark and wet and the branches were flailing around so energetically in the wind that I couldn’t make out if my cab was there or not. I kept imaging Alex lying in Serena’s arms. I was suddenly exhausted, desperate to be home, alone.

‘What are you looking at?’ asked Bel. ‘Right, bed for you, young lady.’ She pushed Hannah gently towards the bedroom door.

‘My cab.’ I squinted down at the street. ‘I wish it’d hurry up.’

‘But Mum –’

‘But Mum nothing.’

I spotted what must be the cab driving slowly down the road.

‘Johnno,’ Bel shouted downstairs, ‘go and tell Maggie’s car she’s coming, can you?’ She pushed a suitcase shut with her foot. ‘Go on, Hannah, before I get really annoyed.’

Dropping the curtain, I went down the stairs. Johnno had left the door ajar and the wind rattled the safety-chain. Shivering, I shoved my feet into my sodden trainers again. ‘Yuk.’

Bel carried a black bin-liner down and shoved it in the cupboard under the stairs. ‘God, it’s freezing. Why’s he left the bloody door open?’

‘Er – so he can get back in? It’s like something from Halloween out there.’

Bel went to the door now. ‘Johnno?’ she called. ‘Hurry up.’