“It’s too little, too late, Evan,” Kat says, cutting me off before leaving me alone in the room, whipping around and not bothering to say another word. I stare at her back as she storms up the stairs.

I’ve never felt this way before in my life. Like I’ve hurt the one person in the world who would never hurt me. Like I betrayed her. Like I’m not worth a damn thing.

And there’s no way to make that right.

I don’t know how to make any of this right.

Kat

I knew the truth,

I didn’t want to believe.

But deep in my gut,

The agony did seethe.

Call me a fool,

Say what you will.

But I can’t help it,

I love him still.

I can’t stop thinking about how Evan fucked her. Samantha is … the opposite of me. Everything about her is exactly the opposite. Disgust doesn’t begin to cover it. All I can imagine is how that night would have played out had his mother not called him. If tragedy hadn’t stepped in to intervene. He fucked her, and then what? Was he going to bail on our date or was he still planning on seeing me?

I should be focused on the fact that he told me he needed an alibi. The fact that only weeks ago he was doing shit he knows is wrong and could send him to jail. But that’s the man he’s always been. I knew better than to turn a blind eye, but that’s exactly what I’ve been doing, isn’t it?

It’s an odd feeling, like waking up from a long and deep sleep or having a blindfold taken off after wearing it for days. Has it always been this way?

I knew what kind of life he was leading and the risks that came with it. I didn’t do a damn thing about it. I should be ashamed, mortified.

And yet all I can think about is him fucking her.

Not to mention how many times I’ve seen that woman at events and socialized with her. Not once did she make it seem like anything had happened between them. She comes off sweet and innocent. She’s slim like me, but taller and she prefers soft, muted colors. Samantha always has perfectly manicured, pale pink nails. She pretties herself up like a little doll, prim and proper. I never would have expected it. I remember how genuinely happy for me she seemed when she gushed over my engagement ring.

That fucking bitch.