I reached out a finger and she found my assailant in the crowd, dancing with his head thrown back, not even looking at me after he’d left a pinch mark on my skin. “Oh, he’s quite cute,” Kim said. “A bit of a chav, but I quite fancy that shaved eyebrow thing. Are you going to go over?”

“Why?”

“To talk! You could totally pull him if he pinched your arse.”

“Er... I just want to dance with you guys.”

Within three songs, two more boys had touched my body. Another arse-pinch from a random hand striking out under the cover of the crowd, alongside some balding guy, who came up behind me and started rubbing his crotch on my back. I could feel the bulge of his genitalia through his jeans and froze, feeling totally sick. Eric, thankfully, noticed my facial expression and plucked me away from him.

“Put your arms around me so you look like my girlfriend,” he said, and, still shocked, I complied. Eric made some gesture, and the old man gyrated off, planting his genitalia onto the back of another unsuspecting teenager to the right of us, as though he was a tired butterfly who just needed a leaf to land on.

“Thanks,” I told Eric’s ear, about to remove my hands, but he pulled me into him, pressing our bodies together.

“I’ve always liked you, Fern,” he shouted, his hand moving up my back. “I’m only saying this because I’m pissed, but I’ve always liked you.”

“What?”