“I’ve never considered a life without Lawrence,” I say quietly. “I try, but he’s always there, even when he’s not. I don’t know how to live without him. I don’t know how to be a person. I can’t do what normal people do, go on dates, talk about myself, have a job, plan a wedding, walk down the aisle. Who would want to marry someone like me? And kids? If I can’t protect myself, how could I ever protect a child?”

“You grow up. You learn how to live. We all do. No one is normal. In fact, I bet you’ll be a better wife, a more empathetic mother. As for your family, when you’re ready, you’ll forgive them.”

“Forgive them? I’m the one who ruined us, who . . .” It’s too intense to think about, like staring into the glare of white light.

“They didn’t protect you.”

“They didn’t know.”

“Cassie, there are no secrets in families. We sense when something is wrong, or off, even if we can’t say exactly what it is. To say Eleanor didn’t know is bullshit. She should’ve known. A parent’s job is to know. She brought you into her home. She raised you. She promised to protect you. And you know what? She failed.”

Pulling into a parking lot, Haggerty shuts off the car and makes his pitch. “You won’t testify alone. We have witnesses. Anton and Joseph Rivera, Maeve McAllister—they all spoke on the record. Did you know Lawrence offered Anton Rivera money to keep him quiet?”

“Who told you this?”

“Eight years ago, Rivera came to me with his concerns. He was iffy about testifying, but I could’ve pressed. Not that it mattered. When I tried to pursue it, I got shut down. Your family was too well known. Too powerful, too connected. But then Billy was arrested, and so I contacted DeFiore and worked with his team. Mostly his investigator. Paul talked to everyone I couldn’t reach.” Haggerty opens his hands. “Two birds, one stone.”

DeFiore. What a piece of shit. “You’re not my client” he told Lawrence. Instead, he used him as bait. Me too.

“So, what’s the problem?” I ask.

“We need you.”

“I can’t,” I say reflexively. “It’s simply not possible.” After the trial, Lawrence promised, we’ll be together. “This is your fight, Detective; not mine. Speaking of—I have to get back.”

“For Lawrence’s testimony? Why would you put yourself through that?”

“It’s fine. He’ll say he knew Diana was trouble. That’s it.” What else could he say? He told me he wasn’t ready to admit the truth. Please wait, he asked. Just a little longer.

“And what about her testimony? What about you?”