I get dressed in a pair of leggings and a long T-shirt, tie my hair back with a band, and then I set about tidying Carrie’s stuff. I sort and fold the clothes that have spilled out of her bag, and when I see anything that takes my fancy, I hold it against myself and check my reflection in the window. It’s not the best, with the train moving quite fast and the background colours changing so quickly, but it’s enough. I open each of the side pockets of her rucksack and have a quick rummage inside, but there’s nothing too exciting. I was hoping for maybe a notebook or a diary, but she seems to store all of her information on her laptop, and she always has that with her. I might ask to borrow it later – tell her I’d like to write some proper emails. She’d hardly believe that I literally have no one to send any emails to.

Eventually I get bored being on my own, and it’s clear that Carrie is not coming back, so I push her rucksack over to the far side of her bed, the neatly stacked clothes lined up beside it. It doesn’t look like I’ve been snooping, and she can hardly complain about my folding her clothes. I open her toiletries bag and take out her deodorant – a roll-on – and use it to freshen up under my arms, then I take a squirt of her toothpaste and rub it over my teeth. It’ll do for now.

I hear her voice before I even get to the dining car – laughing loudly, regaling with an anecdote. Just like in UB, in the Irish Bar – playing to the crowd. I paste a smile onto my face and walk in to the carriage.

‘There you are,’ I say, forcing a jolly, carefree tone into my voice – one that I definitely don’t feel. ‘Thought you’d jumped off.’ I laugh.

She swivels round in her seat, and I see the laptop on front of her, closed, a glass of clear liquid beside her. Is she drinking again? Stupidly, I’d thought we could spend some time together today, catching up, but I see that she’s already making her own entertainment.

A young couple are sitting opposite her, and they smile when they see me.

‘V! Come and meet Jared and Leia. They’ve been travelling for six months – can you believe it?’

Jared and Leia look like the type of know-it-all travellers that I’ve spent my entire trip avoiding – and I’ve been travelling a lot longer than six months.

‘Oh hey,’ says Jared. He holds up his fingers in a peace sign, and I want to punch him in the face.