I don’t catch her reply, but she must say yes, because I hear him fumble with the chair and put his sandwich on the table.

‘What’s happening?’ I whisper.

I roll my eyes.

There’s no way I’m talking to myself

next to some girl

no one seems to know.

There’s just silence. I hear him rip open his sandwich packet. The click of a water bottle opening.

But no Cecelia. Nothing to tell that she’s even there at all.

‘Ask her something! Ask her if she had climbing practice today.’

That’ll make me seem less like a stalker.

I clear my throat.

‘So – um – I heard that there’s a climbing club?’

Purple braids’ head shoots up.

She looks behind her,

like she’s expecting a prank.

‘Yeah. So?’

It’s her. Her voice. And she’s speaking to Rowan. Looking at him eating his lunch.

And I’ve never wanted to be at any table more.

‘Nothing – just that’s cool.’

She still looks frightened and, to be honest,

I don’t blame her.

I sigh.

‘So you know Alice?’

My blood turns to concrete. ‘Don’t mention me!’ I hiss.

Purple braids glares at me like

poison.

‘Look, whoever put you up to this, it’s not funny, okay? I’m eating my sandwich, so just piss off and leave me alone.’

I put my hands up.

‘No one put me up to this.’

I hear Alice suck in a breath.

‘Okay – well, Alice did.

But she doesn’t want me to mention her

for some reason.’

He says the last bit loudly, to make sure I can hear him.

I can. I can hear all of it like it’s happening inside my own head. Like a nightmare.

‘Alice did – what? She doesn’t …’ Cecelia trails off.

Her eyes travel down to the

lump under my hoodie.

And she shakes her head.

‘Seriously, Alice?’

My name. She said my name.

And I’m not sure if I want Rowan to unzip his hoodie and let me out, or pick up his tray and run away. But then I hear the scrape of a chair.

Purple braids leans over,

pointing a finger in my face.

I shrink.

‘You – whoever you are. You show her one testicle and I swear I will hunt you down and chop it off. Don’t think I won’t.’

Holy shit.

I’m sawn in half.

Part of me jumps – soars – dances at her showing that she secretly still cares about me in her own messed-up and entirely petrifying way. And the part of me with Rowan cringes.

‘Um …’ I croak.

She picks up her sandwich and stomps off,

glaring at me like I’m a pervert.

I unzip my hoodie.

‘Yeah … you know, maybe it’s best

if I come up with the stuff we’re gonna do

next time.’

I bite my lip.