Gudrun beamed and clapped her hands. “As they say, necessity is the mother of invention, sooooo . . . we’re going to have a CLAPPING workshop!!! Mittens off, girls!”

After what seemed like hours, the bell went for lunch.

Jo was kicking stuff, doors and everything. She said, “That was so boring. What is the point of spending an hour clapping?”

Vaisey said, “Well, I suppose it teaches you—er—coordination and teamwork.”

Jo was still grumpy. “No. I’ll tell you what it teaches you—it teaches you not to come to a college where there’s a drumming workshop without any drums.”

Vaisey tried to put her arm round Jo. “What’s the matter?”

Jo said, “It’s my fault that we haven’t had any fun, isn’t it? That we’re all cooped up here and made to run round the perimeter wall in our sports knickers.”

Vaisey said, “Well, erm, it’s not really you, is it? I mean, it’s more your boyfriend really.”

Flossie said, “Who, to be frank, only came through our window to see you, so I suppose officially, not to put too fine a point on it . . . Yeah, it is your fault.”

I kicked Flossie and she said, “Oy, that’s my best leg.”

Jo was going on. “I’ve let the school down, I’ve let my parents down, I’ve let the Royal Shakespeare Company down, but most of all I’ve let myself down.”

To cheer Jo up I said, “Yes, that’s true, but look, why don’t I go to our tree today? If the boys turn up they’ll tell me how Phil is.”

Jo nodded miserably. “What if they’ve sent him away as punishment?”

I said, “Jo, he’s already sent away as punishment. He’s at Punishment Headquarters.”

Jo said, “Anyway, it’s not the same if you go. Why can’t I go?”

Jo was impossible to be with for the rest of the afternoon. Kicking chairs and doors and sighing and moaning. Then she deliberately ripped down Bob’s notice about paper towels.

Vaisey said, “I’ll have to do something. I’m going to go and ask Sidone if we can go into the woods to practice an outdoor scene from The Taming of the Shrew.”

Jo said, “Fat chance. What idiot would fall for that?”

Vaisey came back ten minutes later, curly and floppy and smiley. She said, “We’re allowed!” And we gave her the full Tree Sisters hug.

Jo said, “I’m not being biased, but I’ve always liked you best, Vaisey.”

Vaisey went red and said, “Erm, we are allowed to go, but Sidone has phoned Hoppy and he says the culprit is under strict observation twenty-four hours a day and will not be allowed out.”

Boo.

We got togged up in the loos and trundled off into the woods.

Jo was stomping along ahead of us.

“It’s not fair! This is against my human rights. My boyfriend is being held prisoner in a free country. I may do a protest. I’m going to stop washing.”

Flossie said, “Well, that would make Bob’s day. I think he’s got a master plan to make us stop using water altogether. I’m sure he says the loos are out of order on purpose.”