But they need to be wild and free.

Just like Cain.

They flew off into the darkness. And I snuggled down again and feel asleep, thinking about my lovely Charlie.

My first proper boyfriend.

The Corker-Holding with Winter Socks scene

WHERE’S THE JAMES BOND book that Dad gave me? Here it is.

Now where did I get to?

Oh yes. In Jamaica, it’s the bit where Honeychile is so hot and the fans are going round and round in the hotel room. And the waves are crashing against the shore. And so Honeychile took off all her clothes and stood by the window. Yes, this is the good bit.

Bond went across to her and took a breast in each hand. But still she looked away from him out the window.

“Not now,” she said in a low voice.

How does that work? Is that what you’re supposed to do? Should I have said “not now” to Ben?

If I act it out, I might get an idea of what it feels like.

Although it’s hard to imagine someone putting their hands over my corkers as I haven’t really got any.

Maybe if I put socks down the front of my jimjams that would be more like corkers. Yes, but then I wouldn’t know what it felt like to have a hand over each one.

Maybe, if I put the socks on my hands, that would give me more of an idea.

I’ll use my big thick hiking ones.

OK.

Right, I am walking in a sexy way to the window. Phew, I am hot. I am imagining the Caribbean Sea crashing against the shed at the bottom of the garden. James Bond coming over to me. He is putting a hand over each breast. Oooh, the hiking socks are a bit prickly. I am looking away from him out of the window. I am saying, “Not now . . .”

Oh, dear Virgin Mary and all her cohort, there is someone down there looking up at me!!! I bobbed down beneath the windowsill.

The light was on in my room.

Had they seen me fondling myself with hiking socks??

I stayed absolutely still.

Perhaps they hadn’t seen anything and were just looking at owls or . . .

A voice shouted up. “Have you gone all shy now? Why don’t tha come out and play with me?”

And a girl’s voice farther away said, “You think you’re something.”

And the boy said, “Correction, love, I KNOW I’m something. I’m Cain Hinchcliff.”

Georgia’s Ace Gang Snogging Scale

¼. kissing hands

½. sticky eyes (Be careful using this. I’ve still got some complete twit following me around like a Seeing Eye dog.)

1. holding hands

2. arm around

3. good-night kiss

4. kiss lasting over three minutes without a break (What you need for this is a sad mate who’s got a watch but no boyfriend.)

4 ½. hand snogging (I really don’t want to go into this. Ask Jas.)

5. open mouth kissing