BooksBarbecue
Back The Surrogate
Chapters (65)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. Part One
  5. One
  6. Two
  7. Three
  8. Four
  9. Five
  10. Six
  11. Seven
  12. Eight
  13. Nine
  14. Ten
  15. Eleven
  16. Twelve
  17. Thirteen
  18. Fourteen
  19. Fifteen
  20. Sixteen
  21. Seventeen
  22. Eighteen
  23. Nineteen
  24. Twenty
  25. Twenty-One
  26. Twenty-Two
  27. Twenty-Three
  28. Twenty-Four
  29. Twenty-Five
  30. Twenty-Six
  31. Twenty-Seven
  32. Twenty-Eight
  33. Twenty-Nine
  34. Thirty
  35. Thirty-One
  36. Thirty-Two
  37. Thirty-Three
  38. Part Two
  39. Thirty-Four
  40. Thirty-Five
  41. Thirty-Six
  42. Thirty-Seven
  43. Thirty-Eight
  44. Thirty-Nine
  45. Forty
  46. Forty-One
  47. Forty-Two
  48. Forty-Three
  49. Forty-Four
  50. Forty-Five
  51. Forty-Six
  52. Forty-Seven
  53. Forty-Eight
  54. Forty-Nine
  55. Fifty
  56. Fifty-One
  57. Part Three
  58. Fifty-Two
  59. Fifty-Three
  60. Fifty-Four
  61. Fifty-Five
  62. Fifty-Six
  63. Acknowledgments
  64. About the Author
  65. About the Publisher

“Who the fuck is that, the sperm donor?” Digger sounded jealous.

“Yeah,” I said. “I called him, I asked if I could spend, like, another week with the baby, and he said no. He said the two days was generous enough as it was.”

Digger scoffed. “What a dick.”

I paused, and it felt good that Digger had my back. “And then, when I held her—” I tried to explain something that was unexplainable. “It was like it all happened so fast. I just felt like I didn’t have enough time, and Hal and Ruth were, like, breathing down my neck. And they were always hanging around in the hallway and coming in my room to hold her. So . . .”

“Motherfuck.” Digger squeezed the steering wheel as if that would calm him down. “I can’t believe this,” he said finally. When he rubbed his chin, I knew he was coming around. He was almost gonna say yes. “You really drive me crazy, you know that?”

“I know. But you were the only one I could ask,” I said, cradling Nell. “I just need some time to figure this out. Please?”

Digger sighed and looked away. When he faced forward again, he yanked the shift into gear. “Fuck it,” he said, and pulled onto the on-ramp, speeding up.

“Thank you, Digger,” I said, exhaling. “Really.”

We merged onto the highway. In the quiet air of the truck, I could almost feel Digger’s brain working. After a while he asked, “Do you think they’ll pay you the rest?” He glanced at me and I shrugged. “Or would they offer you more?”

“I don’t know, Digger. We’ll find out, okay?” I hated how he focused on the money part. I leaned down to Nell and swayed my legs to rock her slightly. Her cheeks were pimpled. I pulled back her hat and touched her black hair. Her entire face was smaller than my palm. When she yawned, her tiny lips formed a perfect O.

Digger took a swig from his travel mug. The smell of coffee was strong, and I felt a flash of nausea. I kept my hands on the bundled baby and looked out the windshield, wondering what was ahead. Digger hadn’t told me exactly where we were going, but it would be at least three hours to Duluth.

We drove like that for miles, not talking. Black sky, big white snowflakes flying at us, hitting the windshield and melting, then the squawk of the windshield blades wiping away the wet. The rhythm of the wipers at odds with the tires bumping over pavement cracks, and the in and out of breath in my chest.