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Back The Surrogate Save as PDF
Chapters (65)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Epigraph
  4. Part One
  5. One
  6. Two
  7. Three
  8. Four
  9. Five
  10. Six
  11. Seven
  12. Eight
  13. Nine
  14. Ten
  15. Eleven
  16. Twelve
  17. Thirteen
  18. Fourteen
  19. Fifteen
  20. Sixteen
  21. Seventeen
  22. Eighteen
  23. Nineteen
  24. Twenty
  25. Twenty-One
  26. Twenty-Two
  27. Twenty-Three
  28. Twenty-Four
  29. Twenty-Five
  30. Twenty-Six
  31. Twenty-Seven
  32. Twenty-Eight
  33. Twenty-Nine
  34. Thirty
  35. Thirty-One
  36. Thirty-Two
  37. Thirty-Three
  38. Part Two
  39. Thirty-Four
  40. Thirty-Five
  41. Thirty-Six
  42. Thirty-Seven
  43. Thirty-Eight
  44. Thirty-Nine
  45. Forty
  46. Forty-One
  47. Forty-Two
  48. Forty-Three
  49. Forty-Four
  50. Forty-Five
  51. Forty-Six
  52. Forty-Seven
  53. Forty-Eight
  54. Forty-Nine
  55. Fifty
  56. Fifty-One
  57. Part Three
  58. Fifty-Two
  59. Fifty-Three
  60. Fifty-Four
  61. Fifty-Five
  62. Fifty-Six
  63. Acknowledgments
  64. About the Author
  65. About the Publisher

“Cally,” said Ruth, gathering her courage. “What would you think about . . . having full custody of her? Of Nell.”

Cally’s face lit up. “What?” She inhaled. She looked confused, grateful, incredulous. “I would love it. Are you serious?”

Ruth nodded.

“But what about—”

“Hal, I know,” said Ruth, cutting her off before she had to hear that question one more time. “Here’s my idea . . .”

Ruth explained Hal’s distance and distraction. Her theory that this lawsuit was keeping him in a state of perpetual grief, like the coma had kept Jake in an unconscious state. That Ruth thought Hal was only doing it for her. And how Hal needed to be freed from this fight, for himself and for the sake of their marriage. She told Cally about her own trouble with the baby and asked if Cally had any interest in restarting nursing, if possible. Yes, she did.

Ruth went further and mentioned her idea about the article. Asked if Cally would agree to be interviewed. And about Ruth’s strategy for settling all of this legal business with a mutual agreement. She told her what Pat had said about the surrogacy contract and liability for harm done to Cally’s health. Cally said her lawyer was already exploring that, and Ruth said good. Do that.

And while Ruth talked about her exciting ideas, Cally was holding the baby, swaying and cuddling her, and Cally felt a rising lightness inside, a clarity and confidence. It was as if they were all in their right places in this moment. Buoyed by Ruth’s passion and earnestness, Cally gathered her own courage to visualize her life anew, a future as she might design it: with college, career, Sam, and Nell.

And now, with Nell in her arms, her baby’s soft skin as familiar to Cally as her own, she knew, in that deep place of knowing, the very place where Nell had lived inside her, that she would never let her go. And she could see that Ruth knew it, too.

Fifty-Six

Ruth

OCTOBER 2003

For all those months when Cally was pregnant with Nell, I’d been asking her to explain what it felt like. She couldn’t. Especially the birth. She couldn’t find words.