“I’m not good at crying,” she says. “It’s either nothing ever, even when I should be crying, or it’s like a three-day explosion. I hate it.” She takes a deep breath, determined to collect herself, grabs the remote and turns on the television.

We watch a Spenser: For Hire rerun and make fun of the puffy-sleeved satin blouses Spenser’s psychologist girlfriend wears. Carly grabs my hand and holds it, and you’d think it would be weird, but it’s not, because it’s not about anything other than the fact that she really needs a friend.

When Adam comes home, we’re out on the fire escape so Carly can smoke.

“Hello?” he says as he walks in the bathroom and peeks out the window. It’s hard not to jump up and run inside to kiss him, but I don’t want to make Carly feel weird, or rub in the fact that I have someone when she just broke up with her someone.

Carly stiffens, like she’s been caught.

Adam looks confused, but I can also tell that he gets that she’s been crying. “Hi, Carly,” he says, trying hard to act like it’s normal that she’s here so she won’t feel uncomfortable. I’m proud of him. “We were going to order pizza from The Nines tonight. Does eggplant work for you?”

“Sure,” Carly says, and her back loosens up.

Adam tells Carly she can stay as long as she needs to. I want Adam to myself again, almost as soon as he offers, but it’s nice that we can do this for Carly. I finally get to have a friend over. I finally get to be a friend.

We eat pizza and drink beer and watch 90210, lined up in a row on the couch: Adam, me, and Carly. I almost tell them that it’s my first sleepover party, but I think it would be too weird.

Carly sleeps on the futon. She snores. Adam and I lie in bed and giggle every time she gets particularly loud. We have a witness to us now. It’s funny the way we just went to bed like that’s who we are. We’re together and we sleep together and being open about it makes it so much more real. I love it and it terrifies me at the same time, like how I felt when Matty and I climbed to the roof of the high school to watch an eclipse and I stood with my toes at the very edge.

“Looks like you’re in the habit of taking in lost girls,” I say, poking Adam’s shoulder.

“You’re the only one who gets to stay forever,” he says.