‘I was awake anyway.’

Searching my mind, I try to remember when Simon Heskith was singing rugby songs. It must have been about 1.30. I need to cement the whole evening in my mind. It won’t be long before the police are here. We begin walking into the hallway then I stop. What if someone else finds the body? It is a holiday weekend. The sun is shining, and people will be heading to the beach. The one thing I know is that I don’t want a child to find him. No one else needs to be haunted by what I’ve done.

Diana leads me into the little office. ‘He’s not here.’

Pulling me through to the dining room, she is quietly singing ‘Frère Jacques’. The table is laid for breakfast. It just seems wrong knowing what I know. Instead of laughter and heavy heads, this room will be filled with silence and disbelief shortly.

Diana pulls away and looks around the smoking room. ‘He’s not here.’ She frowned. ‘Maybe he’s in the garden. It would be a funny place to fall asleep but that must be where he is.’

She comes back to me and pulls me down so she can whisper in my ear. ‘Mummy, Daddy wouldn’t be with Mr Venn, would he?’

My heart stops. She is too astute. I fix a smile on my face. ‘Definitely not. The Venns left by boat quite early in the evening.’

‘Good.’ She kisses my cheek and my heart breaks. ‘He loves you, you know.’

I close my eyes for a moment.

‘He told me last night.’ Her breath tickles my cheek.

‘Thank you my darling. I kn—know he does.’ I stand upright.

‘Morning.’ Tom pauses in the doorway.

‘Have you seen Daddy?’ Diana grins at him.

He shook his head. ‘Have you lost him?’

‘Yes.’ I pause. I must get this right. ‘I left him about three o’clock and he was heading out into the garden.’

‘On his own?’ He raises an eyebrow.

‘Yes, everyone had gone to bed and I couldn’t keep my eyes open.’ I yawn.

‘Looks like yet again you haven’t had enough sleep.’

I give him a lopsided smile. ‘Diana, why don’t you find Mr Hoskine and see if the two of you can have a look around the garden.’

‘OK.’ She dances off to the back of the house like she is playing hide and seek. If only it could be so innocent. I think about George. When will he appear?

‘Shall I go and have a look on the beach?’ Tom walks towards me. I swallow hard. He shouldn’t find the body alone.

‘I’ll throw some clothes on and come with you.’ Forcing a bright smile, I say, ‘The fresh air will blow the cobwebs away.’ I dash away, digging my nails into my palms.

72. Lottie

72

Lottie

5 August 2018, 6.30 a.m.