The truth was, I had very little idea about what she might have posted, or where it was, or how to get it taken down. And if she couldn’t do it, what chance did I have? We were friends on Facebook for a short time, before Lucy deleted her account, declaring that Facebook was full of adults and weirdos. I couldn’t really argue with her on that.

Maybe Sean would know about this kind of stuff, because he worked in IT. But I couldn’t ask him, not after what had happened between us today.

After an hour of fruitless searching, I turned the iPad off and headed upstairs.

By the time I climbed into bed and switched my light out, I knew I had another sleepless night ahead of me. Too many questions without answers.

I thought Sean was asleep and jumped when his deep voice reached across the darkness between us.

‘Night,’ he said quietly. ‘Love you.’

He always said it, last thing at night.

I didn’t say it back.

Six months earlier

Six months earlier

It’s not until Daisy Marshall’s sixteenth birthday party that she talks to him properly.

She’s sitting with Fran and Emma and Megan in the garden, everyone doing vodka shots. She knows he’s been invited, she’s checked, but it’s anyone’s guess as to whether he’ll turn up. He trains a lot on evenings and weekends with the Saracens rugby academy, where they bring through all their best young players. Saracens is one of the biggest teams in the country and he mostly plays fly-half, in the No. 10 shirt.

She’s done her research.

Then, halfway through the evening, he’s there with his mates, looking hotter than ever, crisp white shirt taut across his shoulders, hair still looking wet from the shower, one of the other lads pressing a bottle of beer into his hand.

Jake beckons him over and introduces them, just like she asked him to.

She has to tell herself not to smile too much, not to be too keen, too soon. Brushing her blonde hair away from her face.

She raises a hand in a little wave and she’s like, ‘Hi, I’m—’

But he cuts her off with a smile.

‘I know who you are.’

‘Do you? You do?’

Missing cool by about a million miles.

‘Me and Jake are both in the First Fifteen. He’s told me all about you.’ His bright blue eyes on hers, long lashes blinking once, twice. ‘He was right, too.’

‘Right about what?’

‘You are the hottest girl in Year 11.’

And there’s a little starburst of joy, a deep glow in the centre of her chest.

A little sun inside her, burning hot.

Tuesday

TUESDAY

Chapter 37

37