Nathan glared at him. ‘Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?’ he growled.

John put his hands on the desk and leaned towards his boss. ‘I thought I was talking to Nathan fucking Conlon, but I don’t have a fucking clue who you are, mate. You’ve been off your fucking face for weeks now. I don’t know what’s gone on. I don’t fucking care. But snap out of it. Fucking wake up – before there’s nothing left for you to wake up to.’

Before Nathan could respond John stomped out, slamming the door behind him as he did. The sound reverberated around the small office, rattling Nathan’s brain in his head. He shook his head to stop the ringing in his ears as there was another knock at the door.

‘Fuck off,’ he shouted, but the door slowly opened, and Jake popped his head in gingerly.

‘You all right, Dad? You look bloody awful.’ He half-smiled, but the concern on his face was clear to see, making Nathan wonder at the state he must be in. He looked down at his clothes – un-ironed and stained. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been home or changed his clothes.

He attempted a smile. ‘Yeah, just had a rough few days, that’s all.’

‘Jesus, you don’t say,’ Jake laughed as he sat down in the chair opposite him. ‘I thought you might fancy a pint? There’s a good band on at the pub, my mate’s the drummer.’ He looked at his father, full of youthful exuberance.

He didn’t have a care in the fucking world, Nathan thought. He’d been just like him once, hadn’t he?

‘Yeah, sounds good, son. Give me half an hour and I’ll be with you.’

Nathan had always kept spare clothes at the club, and everything else he’d ever need if he planned on not going home for a few days, in the bathroom attached to his office. Stepping into the scalding hot shower, he let the water wash away the weeks’ worth of grime. If only it was as easy to wash away the guilt and self-loathing. His head had already started to feel less cloudy, like he could see and hear again. As though he’d been watching an old television and someone had finally fixed the focus. He trimmed his beard with the electric razor and brushed his teeth before putting on a fresh suit and tie. Looking himself over in the mirror, he smiled.

It was good to be back.