‘Mum, you need to stop drinking. We talked about this, remember? We talked about going to that group, the AA. There’s one in Norwich, your doctor suggested it.’

‘What do I need to go to that for?’

It was pointless talking to her in this state. She wouldn’t listen to reason. Other than go up there and lock her away, I wasn’t sure what else I could do. There was too much going on down here to deal with.

‘Mum, I was raped,’ I said, hoping to shock her out of her stupor.

‘What?’

‘I got attacked two weeks ago. It’s why I wasn’t feeling well. A man, he…’ I began to cry. It was always so difficult to say it out loud. To say what he’d done. Stripping my dignity, claiming my body.

I heard a shuffle, like she’d dropped the phone and then a man’s voice, the country twang of his accent.

‘Come on, Liz, the Nelson will be open in a bit.’ Then the line went dead.

I threw the phone across my room, it crashed into the wardrobe and bounced on the carpet. Fuck it, if she didn’t care, then why should I. Let her drink herself to death. The voice in my head said that it wouldn’t have been what Dad would have wanted. I knew that, of course I did, but what could I do? The weight of everything sat upon my shoulders. I needed a distraction, to take my mind off things and I knew just the person to help with that.

Jane came down for the afternoon. She had suggested I come to her, to get out, but could hear my reluctance. She lived in Balham, in a flat-share with three other nurses. It was cramped and too busy, plus I didn’t want to get on a train yet, not by myself. Train stations were always packed and lots of people made my anxiety spike. I feared I’d pass out on the platform, easy-pickings for the unsavoury. Ben joined us for lunch; awkwardly just after I’d told Jane that I might be developing feelings for him. Her excitement was palpable at a possible love interest and her eyes glistened devilishly. I knew she wouldn’t say anything, but my mouth dried up, so getting through my sandwich was a challenge.