– And deadly, sweet as a woman, but take care
when you go to stand up, you will keel over
and decorate the floor with the hues of your colourful vomit
Come morning, a sword is driven through your temple
You have been warned

– Of the drink or of the ladies of this world?

– Both!

Joseph chucked back his head, uproarious,
clearly a man of great charisma and show.

Hector dissolved into the first of three chins.
He was clearly a man of titters.

– To the matter at hand. I sense my time is coming

– Nonsense! You are fitter than men half your age

– That may be, but my soul is weary

– Do not be maudlin, Joseph. ‘Tis not allowed in my company

– I shall be myself because who else can I be?
As I am a fine swordsman, so you are a fine wordsmith
I invite you to write my biography
My life has been accomplished, n’est pas?

– Absolument! And I humbly accept, of course
I am proud to write about such an outstanding
composer–swordsman–pianist–violinist–horseman–soldier
–dancer–swimmer–skater and, if I may be so bold, lover

– Now, now, my head is swelling
You know I detest flattery unless it is insincere
Do I not have a reputation for humility and rectitude to
preserve?

– Fear not: as your official biographer I will preserve it for you

– You must begin with my islands, Guadeloupe
and the terrible Saint-Domingue where I grew up
surrounded by waterfalls, thick pine forests
the gommiers, the exquisite hummingbird
and the volcano La Soufrière, which would rumble
and emit smoke and frighten me as a child
Above all, Hector, I grew up with sugar cane
Sugar cane for Europe’s sweet tooth
She is such a monstrous evil bitch!

He paused, tracing the rim of his glass,
oblivious to Hector’s obvious discomfort.

– The islands formed me, but La Douce France
cultivated my talents

– So, must we begin with the islands?

– With my father, George, a Gentleman of the King’s
Bedchamber, and my darling mother, Nanon,
a slave from Senegal
He bought her freedom. He never took mine away
At ten we sailed to Paris;
at twelve I won my first fencing match

– Such a man as your father is rare in these times, Joseph

– The privilege is given on a master’s whim
You will remember my mother?

– We were all quite taken with her at our salons

– Not all. As for those who were affronted –
Who offends her, offends me, I threatened
Now listen carefully, Hector
The islands are a gaping wound in my heart
I fear I may never be allowed to return

– Why did you plunge yourself into the slaves’ revolution?
Why become a malcontent when the world was at your feet?

Joseph leaned forward in his seat so fiercely

I jumped back in mine, stupidly.

– Slavery on Saint-Domingue is the cruellest anywhere
Plantation beasts are treated better
I fought, because I had to

Hector pulled out a powerfully perfumed

handkerchief and mopped his brow.

– Oh, let us drink some more of this poisonous bitch

– Millions have been enslaved to satisfy our lust for sugar