Easy to say when you’re fucking E’d up. But it got to me, and I tried not to show that I was moved, or that he looked so good to me. It had been three weeks. – Yeah, well tell me that on Monday morning, I smiled. It wasn’t easy, cause I’m well E’d and feeling so much. I would never be fucked around by a guy again though. Never. The noise was getting to me. It had been so good, but Lloyd had turned it into a grating grind with the piece of shit his simple words implanted in my head.

– I’ll be round, he shouted, smiling.

– I’ll believe it when I see it, I said. Who the fuck did he think he was.

– Believe it, he said.

Oh Batman, my Dark Fucking Knight I do not think. – Well, I’m away to find Jane, I told him. I had to get away from him. I was on my trip, in my scene. He’s a fucking freak, a fucking sad freak. I should have known. I should have been able to tell. Lloyd. Go. I moved to the front of the house. I was trying to get back into the music, thrashing, trying to forget Lloyd, to dance him out of my mind, to get back to where I’d been before he appeared. The crowd are going crazy. This mad guy’s in front of Weatherall giving it loads and standing back and applauding as the man responds, taking it higher. I got really hot and breathless and had to stop for a bit. I moved through the mental crowd and hit the bar for some water. I saw Ally, Lloyd’s mate. – What’s Lloyd on tonight, then? I asked him. I shouldn’t have asked him. I’m not interested in Lloyd.

– Nowt, Ally said. He was sweating like he had been really kicking it, – he’s just had a couple ay drinks. Didnae want a pill, eh no. Sais eh wis gaunnae take six months oaf n aw that shite. Didnae want ehs perspective damaged, that was what the daft fucker sais. Listen, Heather, man, he says with an air of confidence, – hope yir no gaunnae make him intae a straight-peg, eh.

Lloyd is not E’d up. A thousand thoughts shoot through my head with the MDMA. Weatherall took it down and I started to feel a bit giddy.

– Listen, Ally, I want to ask ye something, I say, touching him lightly on the arm, – Something about Lloyd. I told him what I heard, at that party. All he did was to laugh loudly, slapping his legs before composing himself and telling me the real story.