“You’ve been married for four fucking years?” Connor grunts in a gruff voice. “How the fuck is that possible? This is dated three months before Lukas joined Kings Security.”

“He’s been living in St. Peppers for four years?” My heart squeezes as I realize he not only lied to his colleagues but to me too.

“Would you mind if I see him first?” Connor asks after a few seconds. “As much as I’m pissed off with Spencer right now, I’d like to know if he remembers something about the incident. Whoever did this needs to pay.”

Time drags by at a snail’s pace. There’s a clock on the wall, which hasn’t changed time in what seems like forever. I wonder who thought to put a clock in the hospital waiting room. This is the worst place for it.

I’m playing with my ring, still nervous and anxious, with numerous questions running through my head, when my phone vibrates.

“Autumn, we just got a call from Mr. Big.”

A touch of relief hits me upon hearing my father’s familiar voice.

I take a deep breath. “Hi, Dad.”

“How’s Lukas?”

“I haven’t seen him yet, but he’s out of surgery and the doctor said he’ll be fine.”

“How are you holding up, tums?”

“I’m…okay. I just didn’t expect this.” I tuck my hand under my thigh to prevent it from shaking, but it isn’t successful. The onslaught of emotion—worry, confusion, hurt—is hard.

“I know, sweetheart. Do you know what he was doing in St. Peppers?” Dad asks carefully.

“He works here.”

“Really? For how long?” His voice rises a notch in disbelief.

“F-four years.”

After a pause, he asks softly, “Did you know?”

“No.” I shake my head and bite my lip.

I’m confused and even hurt that Lukas didn’t share this big change in his life. Since the day we had to get married, we’ve exchanged several emails and letters, and I do consider him a good friend. I thought he felt the same way about me.

“We’ll see you soon, sweetheart. You take care of yourself.”

The call ends, and once again, I feel alone, even though there’s been a continuous flow of men in boots and leather jackets or suits coming in and out of the waiting room. But they’re all strangers to me. It suddenly becomes clearer that, for some reason, Lukas made sure I had no idea about this part of his life.

5. Lukas

5

LUKAS

The next time I wake up, it’s to the soft voice of a nurse coming from someplace far away. “Mr. Spencer, how are you feeling?”

“I’m…okay.” I groan. “Merida. The girl…who was with me.”

“Everyone’s safe, Mr. Spencer. You just relax.” She speaks carefully.

“What happened to me?”

“You were hit by two bullets, sir.”