I’ve never been that kind of girl who loved going into stores and trying on a bunch of outfits and not solely because we didn’t have the money. When there were sales, I’d go and stock up on the basics: jeans, long-sleeved shirts, sweaters for winter, and a good pair of sneakers and boots. I didn’t need much. That doesn’t change simply because I’m in a new state.

Paula, however, disagreed with my logic. It shouldn’t surprise me since for a trip to the mall she’s dressed in black skinny capris, a silk tunic and light cardigan, layers of four different necklaces, and black wedge sandals. Her long hair is curled, and she has on more makeup than I wore to Homecoming. I, however, am in basic jean shorts and a nondescript green T-shirt with Marian’s plastic flip-flops.

Paula wanted me to get a whole new wardrobe since I only have one other pair of shorts and a half-dozen short-sleeved shirts. I felt uncomfortable having her spend money on me, but it seemed to make her happy. So I, once again, was forced to play the role of agreeable daughter and tried on what she pulled for me and ignored Sarah’s glare when I’d come out of the changing room in a new outfit that was a bit more girly (lace tank tops and short skirts) than I would normally pick out for myself.

“Oh, so she gets the new iPhone,” Sarah complains when Paula picks up a phone for me. I shudder when I see the price.

“I really don’t need anything fancy,” I say for what feels like the four-hundredth time today.

Maybe Paula’s making up for lost time, but with every swipe of the credit card my guilt deepens.

“Well, we might as well get you the newest one,” Paula reasons.

“Can I go to Starbucks?” Sarah asks.

“I think we should stay together,” Paula replies.

“She’s here, okay?” Sarah points at me like she’s accusing me of something. “Everything is fine, just perfect. You have what you wanted. What you always wanted.”

“Sarah, sweetheart.” Paula reaches out to her, but Sarah backs away.

“I can be on my own for a few minutes. I’m eleven. My friends are allowed to go to places by themselves.”

“Come here,” Paula says sternly as she takes Sarah by the arm. She leads her to a corner for some privacy. I try to ignore their not-so-quiet argument.

“Here we are,” a guy with brown skin and long locs says to me as he brings out my new phone. “Do you want to keep your number and plan, or do you need a new one?”

“Ah.” I have no idea what I need. “I think I need a new plan?”